North Star Writers Group

I spent Thanksgiving with my in-laws. During dinner we talked about racism. The conversation arose when someone shared an experience from his workplace. Apparently, when he asked to see the ID of an elderly African American woman, she became upset because she had never been asked for it before. She blamed the experience on racism.

Coincidentally, this came only days after Michael Richards’ racist tirade, which was one of the most awful displays many of us have ever seen or heard.

It is instances such as these that remind us that, even now – over 40 years since the civil rights movement, over 140 years since the Civil War – racial tension has yet to be eradicated from our society.

But I am finished with the word racism. I think it is all but dead. A racist believes that “race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority for a particular race.” It has no direct connection to discrimination. Racism is merely a belief that almost no one maintains any longer.

Racism is not America’s problem.

Our country, along with others in the world, is struggling with cultural tension stemming from the rapid integrating of societies, all of which have their own, long and specific histories. To say that, “Most inner-city African-American kids like basketball,” or “Chinese people tend to like the Houston Rockets,” is not racist, just as it is not racist to say, “Most Americans can’t speak two full sentences in any language other than English.” These are stereotypes, not racist remarks.

Allow me to assure you that everyone stereotypes. And while there are probably any number of psychological explanations for why we stereotype, and why some of us may do it more frequently than others, the only reason stereotypes ever came into existence is personal experience.

Whether it is stereotyping middle Americans as rednecks who love NASCAR, professional wrestling and George Bush, citizens of Seattle as pothead hippies who complain too much, male stylists as gay, Pentecostals as charismatic and hypocritical wack-jobs, women as moody, men as oblivious, old people as smelly, Latinos as over-zealous auto-mechanics, Canadians as disturbingly nice, classical musicians as snobs, artists as pretentious and depressed chain-smokers and alcoholics, Jews as big-noses who are careful with money, African Americans as rappers and basketball players who wear baggy clothing and shiny jewelry or homosexuals as unable to converse about anything other than homosexuality or fashion, every one of us, or at least anyone I’ve ever known beyond a handshake, stereotypes.

But I don’t think stereotyping, in and of itself, is the problem. As I said, most stereotypes stem from experience. The problems are a bit more complicated.

It is a problem that many of us are sick to death of the truth behind many of our stereotypes, and we content ourselves to store up hateful attitudes instead of sympathy, understanding and active problem solving.

It is also a problem that Americans are constantly throwing around the word “racism,” without realizing the magnitude of what the term actually claims. The result is rarely increased understanding. It is usually oversensitivity on the part of both the alleged victims of racism, and those who feel obligated to do anything and everything to ensure that they are not labeled as bigots. As long as the word “racism” lives on with such liberality, the separation between races will only increase.

The other problem is that, while we fiercely defend the exceptions to stereotypes, we ignore the ugly truth behind some of them. Some cultural tendencies are harmless or even constructive. But others are not.

While it is not a good idea to flippantly throw around stereotypes in our everyday conversations, there is nothing wrong with discussing them. They ought to be discussed. A discussion about a stereotype, especially among the stereotyped, could very readily bring about an attitude of responsibility, instead an attitude of defense. Although it would rarely be a comfortable experience to consider a negative stereotype about one’s own race, demographic, minority or group, what harm can come from asking firstly, is it true, and secondly, how can we help to improve the situation?

While some stereotypes are considerably hurtful and some of us are stereotyped more frequently than others, the worst response is to get ticked off and blame everyone else, no matter how natural these response may feel. As usual, the responsible, most effective response is the most difficult. We must ask ourselves, am I helping or hurting myself and those around me? For while all we can truly affect is our own wounded, tiny corner of the world, what we can hope for is a world overwhelmed with tiny corners on the mend.

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This is Column # NS32. Request permission to publish here.