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Nathaniel Shockey

Nathaniel Shockey hails from Philadelphia, but currently resides in the San Francisco Bay Area. He wrote an opinion column for the Seattle Pacific University newspaper, where he received a degree in English Literature. He is a diehard sports fan, and maintains that a Philadelphia championship is the only thing he desires above world peace. Blue-collar East Coast roots have apparently left him somewhat ill-prepared to live in California, where he feels constantly out of place. He says that SportsCenter and Hemingway are the only things keeping him from losing his grip. He blames his wife for luring him into the unbearable landscape of Northern California.

Nathaniel's Previous Columns

 

South Park Kills Britney Spears, While the Crowd Cheers Them On - March 31, 2008

 

College Basketball Can Be Ridiculous, But March Madness Rules - March 24, 2008

 

Barack Obama and Race: Get Ready for a Grimy Shower Mess - March 17, 2008

 

Hey, You, Generous Tipper: Thanks for Buying the Booze! - March 13, 2008

 

Obama’s Black, McCain’s Old and Hillary’s Female; Now Shut Up About It! - March 10, 2008

 

Even Without a Ball, Some Sports Have Inherent Value - March 3, 2008

 

The Academy Awards Have No Integrity, But Daniel Day-Lewis is Awesome - February 26, 2008

 

‘You Haven’t Seen Casablanca?’ And Other Pretentious Questions - February 25, 2008

 

Technology . . . And How We Use It - February 18, 2008

 

‘Lost’ Returns; Now Will J.J. Abrams Make the Return He’s Promised? - February 11, 2008

 

Super Bowl XLII is a Giant of a Story - February 4, 2008

 

Roger Federer: In Hemingway Fashion, My Hero Lets Me Down - January 28, 2008

 

How is Michael Savage On the Air? Oh, That’s How - January 21, 2008

 

Before You Pick a President, Pay Attention and Think - January 14, 2008

 

Capitalism Works, But Britney Spears Can Tell You: Evil Gets Rich - January 7, 2008

 

Patriots Did It, But Can They Do It? - December 31, 2007

 

Capitalism at Christmas: The Festival of Colorful, Oddly Shaped Resources - December 24, 2007

 

Why Should I Trust Oprah Winfrey? Do I Know Her? - December 17, 2007

 

‘Who Do You Work For?’ <punch in the face> - December 10, 2007

 

Christ Wasn’t Born on December 25, Because I Have to Get My Tree Now - December 3, 2007

 

My Manhood’s On the Line, But I Love ‘Dancing With the Stars’ - November 26, 2007

 

Immigration Waffling, Reagan and the Clinton Thumb: How Not to Get My Vote - November 19 2007

 

No, You Just Think It’s the Most Incredible - November 12, 2007

 

Oh Yes, Barry Bonds, They Can Give You an Asterisk - November 5, 2007

 

I Wanted to Be a Cow, But I’m Stuck Being a Writer - October 29, 2007

 

Here in NoCal, Your Assimilation Begins with the Avocado - October 22, 2007

 

Nate’s Halloween Party: Go Away, Kid, You Bother Me! - October 15, 2007

 

The Arbitrary Nature of Humanity - October 8, 2007

 

Fight Night at the Marriage - October 1, 2007

 

Will Liberals and Conservatives Remove Their Brains from the Freezer? - September 27, 2007

 

Britney Spears Didn’t Ask for This - September 17, 2007

 

If the Opener Is Any Indication, It’s Rebuilding Time for the Philadelphia Eagles - September 10, 2007

 

I Still Believe in the Phillies, But Is the City's Long Curse My Fault? - September 6, 2007

 

For the Security of the Western World, Phillies, Make the Playoffs! - September 3, 2007

 

Falcons Are Better Off, But Does Michael Vick Really Deserve Prison Time? - August 27, 2007

 

From Henry Ford to the Internet, Technology Inspires People’s Worst - August 20, 2007

 

Now Playing: ‘300’ and the Return of Masculinity - August 13, 2007

 

Baseball Part of America’s Family; Soccer an Occasional Guest - August 6, 2007

 

I’m Ready to be Labeled Conservative - July 30, 2007

 

Wine-Tasting: Bar-Hopping Made Up to Look Cultural - July 23, 2007

 

For the Horrible Phillies, There Are No Words - July 16, 2007

 

Would Hemingway Be Proud of the Tragedy that is Barry Bonds? - July 9, 2007

Singular Socks and Other Brilliant Business Concepts - July 2, 2007

Longing for Tragically Confused Seattle - June 25, 2007

Forced to Costco: Let the Battle of Wits Begin - June 18, 2007

Goodbye, Friend: Oh the Stories You Could Have Told - June 11, 2007

The Four Types of American Sports Fan - June 4, 2007

Oh No! Not Another Pistons/Spurs Final! - May 28, 2007

Hopelessly Addicted to 'Lost' - May 21, 2007

Dear Paris, Thanks for Writing! Kisses, Arnold - May 14, 2007

Warriors Story So Awesome, Even a Philly Guy Loves It - May 7, 2007

Out of Utter Brokenness Comes Hope - April 30, 2007

Philly Boy Hangs Ten, Dude - April 23, 2007

Legislation Based on Morality? As Opposed to What? - April 16, 2007I

Is an Atheist Just the President We Need? - April 2, 2007

So You're Listening to Me! Here's More Financial Advice - March 26, 2007

Can We Accept That Racism is Dead? - March 19, 2007

Relegated to the Apology Box - March 12, 2007

Four Financial Tips from Nate the Economist - March 5, 2007

Oscars: Well-Bookended Boredom - February 26, 2007

I Give Up - February 19, 2007

Does Insurance Ensure the Loss of Community? - February 12, 2007

You Call This a Super Bowl? - February 5, 2007

Another Tragedy, Another Scapegoat - January 29, 2007

Fast Food Fiend, Heal Thyself - January 22, 2007

In Defense of Sales-Driven Manipulation - January 15, 2007

My Contribution to Your Noodle Salad Mind - January 8, 2007

The Challenge of Ordering Steaks Like a Whiz - January 1, 2007

Tell Me To Be Merry, Will Ya? - December 25, 2006

A Surprisingly Human James Bond - December 18, 2006

Ads to World: Laugh Don't Think - December 13, 2006

Sure, But Can You Rub Your Therapist's Tummy? - December 6, 2006

Stereotyping: Tiny Corners on the Mend - November 29, 2006

Time for Thanks Amid the Things? - November 22, 2006

The Truth Can't Make A Mess Look Clean - November 15, 2006

Voting: Not Solemn Duty, But a Necessary One - November 6, 2006

Get a Grip; Halloween Is Not Cool - November 1, 2006

Does America Have a Clue What Marriage Is? - October 25, 2006

The Laugh Track and Its Emotional Comedic Scars - October 18, 2006

This Time the Terrorists Have Gone Too Far - October 11, 2006

Inside the Philly Sports Fan: A Scary Place to Be - October 4, 2006

Get Your Fix of 'It's Not Your Fault' - September 27, 2006

Oh, We Can Laugh At Ourselves...Maybe Too Much -  September 20, 2006

9/11 Lessons Missed for Americans? - September 13, 2006

Government Can Help, But Only Humans Can Heal - August 30, 2006

The Ring Is Normal Enough, But Am I Ready for Marriage? - August 16, 2006

News:  America's Entertainment Tonight - August 2, 2006

Time for Political Partisans to Become Childish - July 5, 2006

Can U.S. Nationalism Survive Political Futbol? - June 21, 2006
 
For US Soccer, Either Elitism or Exuberance - June 7, 2006
 
Bean Barry, And Other Schemes To Prevent 715 - May 24, 2006
 
We Don't Remain Glorious If Anything Goes - May 3, 2006
 
Sudo-What? America Goes Fad Once Again - April 19. 2006
 
Kid, You're Too Young To Ball - April 5, 2006
 
The Unnaturals: Don't Blame the Steroids - March 22, 2006
 
The Bouncy Smiley Face vs. the Joy Killers - March 8, 2006
 
Sports: The Only Real Reality TV - February 22, 2006
 
Leader of the Free World Speaks, and the Eagle Has Landed - February 8, 2006
 
Free Speech Rights . . . and Responsibilities - January 18, 2005
 
Kong: Peter Jackson Gives Audiences Three Hours of Credit - January 11, 2005
 
A Race Monger Seeks Attention, And I Foolishly Comply - December 21, 2005
 
Smokers Need Not Apply, Other Problems Welcome  - December 7, 2005
 
Note to Washington: Serenity Now! - November 30, 2005
 
Political Steroid Fix Worse Than the Problem - November 23, 2005
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