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Giants Week: The sports of our fathers
(After last night's victory, we're declaring this Giants Week. Look for baseball-themed posts for the next several days ...)
When I was 7 or 8 -- I forget the year exactly, but it was a long, long time ago -- I ran outside the house, pummeled an innocent hydrangea bush and cried and cried until I fell down on the front porch in a great big wailing mess of emotional tantrum soup.
patchristin.com
Hard to believe this seal got a roster spot over Zito.
Why, exactly?
Because the Detroit Red Wings lost ... something. The Stanley Cup? A playoff series? I'm not sure. I only remember dashing from the TV room and deciding in the heat of the moment that if I was going to have a sobbing, noodle-limbed break down, I might as well let all my friends know about it. They needed someone to beat up the following Monday.
Nowadays, of course, I can get my head around the loss of a favorite sports team, have some perspective and just let it go. Most of the time.
Still, it's been fun and insightful to watch the Giants prelude to the playoffs over the past week or so -- and then the playoffs themselves -- with my daughter. At 4, Emmeline enjoys keeping score and noting whenever Pablo "Panda" Sandoval comes up to the plate. She literally stops whatever she's doing and watches with abandon. The same thing happens whenever she sees Lou Seal, the mascot. And it occurs to me that a part of her probably believes that underneath that smily, round body, Pablo may just actually be a panda and she's waiting for evidence. Read More 'Giants Week: The sports of our fathers' »
| October 12 2010 at 06:06 AM
Random fun things to do with kids to kill time
We are seriously losing grip on an already tenuous nap situation in our household, but if there's an upside, it's that I feel a lot less tied down by scheduling and trip planning and have just begun to let days take charge and form themselves.
So we've been filling our days with more and more activities, not bothering to rush home in the afternoon to grab some shut eye for a few hours. While it has been killing my afternoon work time -- those precious few hours when I could get crap done, clean the house, maybe find time for a quick workout -- the kid and I have found some fun activities I wanted to share.
1. The Fairy Doors of Noe Valley. (Take a look at the pictures here.) These are seriously fun and incredibly simple. Someone or some group started putting up miniature fairy doors along the 24th Street corridor in Noe Valley, hiding them behind benches or tables along the walls of businesses and mini-plazas. We spent a solid hour scouting the block in search of the doors and it occurred to me that the businesses probably put them up as a genius marketing scheme to get people into the establishments, but who cares? I'm no longer 4, but I had just as much fun as my daughter trying to find them. Read More 'Random fun things to do with kids to kill time' »
| September 23 2010 at 07:06 AM
The badges of honor of a Bay Area resident
During my oft-discussed massive basement reorganization earlier this year, I ran across this T-shirt from the 1985 Bay to Breakers, which was being used like packing material around some Junior Statesman of America debating trophies. It may be the most 1980s garment of clothing that I've ever seen -- as if someone in the B2B marketing department had been instructed to design a T-shirt that combined "Miami Vice" and the graphics of the Atari 2600 -- and throw in the "People are Talking" fonts just for fun.
Anyone else feel like playing Super Breakout?
I once had at least three Bay to Breakers shirts, all obtained in my early teens, including one that featured a fish-shaped running shoe on a dark gray-green background and a lavender one with a tortoise and a rabbit. Due to a late growth spurt, none of them would come close to fitting me in 2010. (I had to convince my wife to model this 1985 shirt, to the right, which I received when I was 14 years old -- about a foot shorter and 65 pounds lighter than I am now.)
It got me thinking about the specific badges of honor that identify Bay Area residents. You could live your entire life in Kansas and probably still buy anI Hella Love Oakland sweatshirt or a Barry Bonds bobblehead online. But there are some trophies that just can't be faked. As a Bay Area resident, I immediately know someone is old school when they show up wearing a 1980s Run to the Far Side T-shirt, or have a bumper sticker that was given to them by Alex Bennett.
Below are several identifiers of native San Franciscans and other old school Bay Area residents, which cannot be duplicated, are virtually unknown to someone who didn't live here and are almost impossible to find on eBay. Please speak up in the comments if you have any or all of these items -- and let us know any others we should add to the list.
Read More 'The badges of honor of a Bay Area resident ' »| August 18 2010 at 07:02 AM
One Golden State Warriors fan's advice for Larry Ellison
Updated! Thursday 7/15 at 11:30 a.m.: Ellison appear to be out and a group led by entertainment mogul Peter Guber is in. So when you read the following, replace the name "Larry Ellison" with "Peter Guber and friends." And Larry, if you're reading this, please spare the neighborhood of Maxwell Park when you exact your revenge against Oakland ...
The greatest friend of a sports fan is an incredibly rich owner with a huge ego who gets angry easily, takes defeat personally and loves living in the region. Larry Ellison with his Oracle billions is an incredible five-for-five. It's like genetic scientists created this man to own the Warriors, combining Mark Cuban's enthusiasm for sports, Paul Allen's money and Genghis Khan's instinct to behead anything that gets in his way. Best of all, this is a guy who appears to have spent much of his life motivated by vengeance. And if the late George Steinbrenner taught us nothing, vengeance wins championships.
checkoutmycards.com
Sleep with this card under your pillow ...
But as a Warriors superfan -- one of those idiots who is optimistic at the beginning of each season, gets his hopes horribly dashed, and then stupidly comes back even more sunny about the team's prospects the next year -- even I have worries about my prayers finally getting answered. If Ellison indeed takes over the team, as a Chronicle report indicates he's about to do, this is still a delicate situation. Important decisions are going to be made in the next few months that will greatly influence how awesome this potential owner/fan marriage is going to be.
I'll let sports writers and columnists far more knowledgable than me tell Ellison what to do with complicated issues like player talent, the coaching dilemma and the Indian burial ground under the arena that seems to be responsible for two-thirds of the team getting injured every season. This is coming from a fan who has never stepped foot in the press box, pays for most of his tickets and knows the pain of buying a Jason Richardson "The City" jersey two months before the player was traded for an injury-prone 20-year-old. (I'm wearing it to games anyway. Until I'm 75 ...)
Here's some advice from a Warriors fan to Larry Ellison, assuming reports are correct that he's about to take over ownership of the team. If not, please pass this memo on to that 24 Hours Fitness guy ... Read More 'One Golden State Warriors fan's advice for Larry Ellison' »
| July 14 2010 at 09:02 AM
Window locks and peace of mind
"I don't want to have our son die from falling out of the window," were the (admittedly dramatic) words I used as a not-too-pleasant plea. I was trying to get my husband to Cole Hardware to buy safety stops and guards for the windows of our second story apartment. That's definitely not a usual requested to-do for either of us.
aviva.co.uk
Worth the effort.
Hearing about a child falling and getting seriously hurt due to an accident involving high-up windows almost makes me stop breathing. I can't imagine the pain and sadness that such an accident would cause for a parent. Yet, I can't stop reading or thinking about it. The details of such accidents involving kids will stay in my head for days, something that didn't happen before I was a parent. (Exhibit A: my obsessive watching of disturbing cases involving tykes on "Law & Order: SVU" ... hello ...)
The most recent story that caused my husband and I to finally act and do something that may help our son stay safe came from the Chronicle. Carolyn Said reported last month on a child in Petaluma who fell 15 feet from a second-story window while playing. Reading about his screams and injuries gave me the jitters. Reading the news in our apartment, my mind started to wander. The "what ifs" can easily multiply in my mind as I look at how easy it would be for Cipriano to jump up on our bed, open a window, and fly/fall down, down, down to the pavement below.
Have you installed any locks or stops on your windows? Do you have favorite products or methods for making keeping your family's windows safe?
Said had tips on preventing such falls, sourced from Safe Kids USA:
Read More 'Window locks and peace of mind' »| June 24 2010 at 05:50 PM
My dinner with Dwight Clark (and your celebrity athlete encounters ...)
After a heated discussion on the Facebook page, I'm ready to announce our next photo contest. I'm feeling a lot of pressure to top the Childhood Bowl Cut Challenge from last year, which is pretty much impossible. Remember this guy? But there is another subject close to my heart ...
i.cdn.turner.com
Hell yeah.
When I was growing up in the Bay Area, kids actually had a pretty good chance of meeting their favorite athlete. I'm not sure if cash was involved, or if the level of goodwill was just higher in the 1970s and 80s, but celebrity athletes were always appearing in random places. Sleepy Floyd might show up to the Kiwanis Club pancake breakfast. Or Mike Ivie might come to your school and talk about how he overcame stuttering. (Both of those are fictitious examples. You get the point.)
We had a pretty steady stream of athletes coming to our high school. They usually gave a short speech and then signed autographs. So it wasn't that crazy that my favorite athlete, Dwight Clark, showed up to a Rotary Club function in 1985 that a few students were invited to attend. But I still remember freaking out, and even rushing out with my parents to buy a special new knit tie for the occasion. The photo and story are below. Your athlete encounters in the comments.
Or better yet ... if you want to get a jump, send any photos of your childhood self with a favorite local athletes to phartlaub@sfchronicle.com, along with a short explanation detailing the experience. I'll write a post later today officially announcing the contest ... Read More 'My dinner with Dwight Clark (and your celebrity athlete encounters ...)' »
| June 14 2010 at 07:32 AM
Are you tempted by Dream House raffles?
Occasional Lotto players, do you ever take bigger gambles in the form of Dream House raffles? Who doesn't want to win a "Dream House" (or 1.5 million in cash instead)? Charities that raffle off things like $3 million dollar Arts & Crafts style dream houses with 4 BR and 3.5 baths in the Bay Area get my attention when I see their ads at bus shelters, or on a building. Perhaps I'm allowing my dreamer or sucker bents to flourish when I do that, instead of immediately telling myself "bulls&$%!", at the sight of a rather grand and ritzy looking Dream House. Generally, I am not pining for bigger and better digs. (Why would I work in food if I was all about money and big homes?)
sfraffle.com
The odds are long ...
Do you ever buy a Lotto or Dream House ticket in the hopes of winning money or a new "dream" home for you and your family?
I'm not trying to poke fun at anyone with a gambling problem, since that can have real problems and consequences. In my case, it feels like I could avoid buying an occasional Lotto ticket over the years by just plunking down the money for one Dream House raffle ticket. For me, I buy a Lotto or Dream House ticket in the hopes of achieving the same results.
A year or two ago, my husband and I paid $150 to enter one of these Dream House contests, and didn't win. No Dream House for us just yet! To call our current place a Dream Apartment would also be a stretch, but it is our home, with lots of (mostly good) memories. Our Dream House money went to a charitable good cause, which helps me feel better about the whole thing, but I kind of want to kick myself for falling for the idea of winning my own Dream House. I can visit Reno Vegas without wanting to spend and eventually lose major money. So why can't I resist the Dream House Raffle? Read More 'Are you tempted by Dream House raffles?' »
| March 22 2010 at 03:05 PM
Why I think my son may be a cybernetic organism
Let me start by saying that I'm only maybe 30 percent sure my son is a cybernetic organism. That means if I was in Las Vegas right now, and the line on my 4-year-old being part boy/part machine was 3-to-1, I would definitely not put any money down.
impawards.com
He was sent here to protect ...
I'm also not trying to pull an Ayelet Waldman here. I love my wife and sons exactly equally, and if one of them in fact turns out to be a toaster, I will not love that cyborg an iota less than the humans in my family. One more pertinent fact: I have reason to believe that if he is a cyborg, my son is one of those cybernetic organisms who was sent here to protect us. Like maybe a cross between the "T2"-era T-1000 and Bishop from "Aliens." (What he's protecting us from I'm not sure, but I have ... a few ... theories.) At worst, my son is a sleeper agent, which I can live with, too. It's not like he even knows he's a machine bent on exterminating the human race.
But we're getting way ahead of ourselves. There was an incident this weekend involving one of his toys and some very cyborg-like behavior that was definitely an epiphany moment for me. I'm not going to say that my suspicions were completely repressed before, but before Friday, I thought there was at best a 10 percent chance my son was a replicant.
Below are my four biggest reasons I think my son may be a cybernetic organism (or a bioengineered one -- for the sake of simplicity I'm using the two terms interchangeably). If you've had some similar experiences please write about them in the comments. Maybe we can organize a playdate.
Read More 'Why I think my son may be a cybernetic organism' »| February 22 2010 at 07:06 AM
Mise en place and the realities of parenting
I'd love to read the latest issue of Vanity Fair. If I could find it. I know it's here, somewhere ... . We have a "situation" in our household (okay, it's a two bedroom apartment) that many parents may find familiar: organized chaos.
vanityfair.com
Definitely not in its place ...
There's that knowing you have an item -- blanket, toy, medicine, ointment -- but you just can't remember where it's stashed. For all my efforts at the daily organizing and keeping track of gear, toys, and other kid-related supplies (not to mention my own books/magazines and work files), I sometimes want to hide my head under a pillow and yell, "Nooooo!" when I can't find things. For me, exercise or chopping herbs and garlic is a good route of therapy. But I really just want to know where all my stuff is.
Recently my son, Cipriano, decided that "I found it!" was the name for a space heater. He was in the living room with me when I was ripping apart a closet and yelled, "I found it!" For weeks after, whenever it would get chilly & we'd bust out the space heater, Cipriano would point to it and chortle, "I found it!" We tried to tell him it's a heater, or that it's hot, to no avail.
Not being able to find things can be stressful and irritating. I've found it can also cost money. Take what is known as The Rain Cover Incident: it had been raining (hard) outside all day. We had plans to walk to a dinner party. If we instead had reservations at a restaurant, I probably would have called to cancel. Finding the special order $30 rain cover was stressing us out, and I was starting to get irritated. Oscar kept telling me, "I didn't get rid of it" (read: I am the one who makes weekly trips to donate gear to the Salvation Army) as I looked in the closets, and behind our couch for the rain cover. We never did find the rain cover, but did luck out and get a reprieve from the rain gods. So our time spent bickering did lead to dry weather.
Read More 'Mise en place and the realities of parenting' »| February 17 2010 at 04:10 PM
"Apple trees and honey bees and snow white turtle doves ..."
I got to thinking the other day, as I stared at my son's class picture posted on the fridge, that his childhood will be so different compared to mine. His third grade class photo reminded me of that 1971 Coca-Cola ad featuring a field full of multi-ethnic people singing while holding a bottle of Coke. (The video is above. Ear-worm warning!)
Growing up in Bay Area suburbia in the 1970s, I can't recall an African American student in my class until I hit middle school and even then a non-white student was rare. Zack's friends come from a wide range of racial, ethnic, religious and socio-economic backgrounds. Some kids have two moms. Some have two dads. Some live with grandparents and some are adopted.
Their generation isn't learning about diversity. They're living it. His world is that Coke commercial. Well, kind of. He's starting to get that prejudice exists or that some children have experienced bad stuff at some point in Oakland or another country.
But I can't help thinking that his generation will see less bad stuff than mine did when it comes to race or religion or whatever. He might vaguely remember a country that wouldn't elect a black man president, but he won't remember much. Read More '"Apple trees and honey bees and snow white turtle doves ..."' »
| February 16 2010 at 04:04 PM
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