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pam ayres

  • Ordeal by school: memories of that terrifying first day

    Ordeal by school: memories of that terrifying first day

    Pam Ayres, Writer Then, after several years of getting the hang of it, you are whisked off to another place of employment where the people are even bigger and brainier, and possibly hit you even harder.
  • Howard Jacobson: Where's the culture in our football?

    I foreknow, for example, that Ed Balls will not one day be Prime Minister of this country, that Pam Ayres will not be invited to take up the Oxford Chair of Poetry, that we will not retain the Ashes, that Andy Murray will…
  • The Works, By Pam Ayres

    If you like Pam Ayres, get the audio book. Ayres does have some talent as a versifier. Most of the poems in this career-spanning anthology embody sentiments with which it is impossible to disagree. Would anyone ever think…
  • Matthew Norman: A TV Discard Party to clean up politics

    Matthew Norman: A TV Discard Party to clean up politics

    Professor Pat Pending from Wacky Races, Bernie The Bolt, Pam Ayres, and the late Ali Bongo. The tide of popular support for Esther, already flowing strongly, became a surge once her former jungle colleague David Van Day…
  • The people's poet

    The people's poet

    She is already being discussed as if she were the bastard offspring of Alfred, Lord Tennyson and Pam Ayres, creating as if by alchemy verse that appeals to professors and plebs alike. Bad luck Carol Ann, in that case.
  • Maps of my life, By Guy Browning

    Maps of my life, By Guy Browning

    Ocean and Tasman Sea and gave it features such as "Pam Ayres' Rock". Their terrain ranges from his parents' back garden to Niagara Falls. These are usually real maps customised to take account of his life.
  • Preview: The Daphne du Maurier Festival of Arts and Literature, Fowey, Cornwall

    Other highlights include former Soft Cell lead singer Marc Almond performing; Viv Hendra using images of paintings by the Cornish artist John Opie to tell the story of the Cornish peasant who became professor of painting at…
  • Pam Ayres: Ayres and graces

    Pam Ayres: Ayres and graces

    That must be good for your ego.I did not expect to have to talk up Pam Ayres to Pam Ayres but that's what I do. We can't have Pam Ayres not believing in Pam Ayres. This is what everyone loves about Pam Ayres; the fact she is…
  • The 5-minute Interview: Pam Ayres, Poet, sketch writer and performer

    If I weren't talking to you right now I'd be.Putting together some performances for next week. I'm doing one speech and one normal show. It should make an interesting evening.A common misperception of me is.That my solo show…
  • Miles Kington: The imperishable Sir Cliff and other national treasures

    Funny you should mention Jilly Cooper and Pam Ayres, by the way. Pam Ayres? But Pam is just a bit regional. Camilla, possibly? Give her time .What about Prince Philip? Interesting case," he says. He's the right man in totally…
  • Christina Patterson: I had to go to China to find some decent art

    The one question these "bold", "innovative" works never raise, of course, is how capitalism is "subverted" by lumps of plastic sold for the price of an extra bedroom.If this makes me sound like some kind of a philistine –…
  • Charles Nevin: There's life in these old bones yet, kids

    In the meantime, though, I note that Pam Ayres has taken up skiing.Spare a thought for the winnersSport makes many calls on sympathy: for gallant losers, stumblers, chokers, twitchers, hobblers, weepers and sudden succumbers…
  • Miles Kington: Sometimes, 'thank you' is the hardest word

    Send all attempted presents back, I say, not with a thank-you letter but with a 'Not Known At This Address', or 'Gone Away' or 'Recently Deceased' written on the package in suitably black ink.Pam Ayres"I write a note to say…
  • Passed/Failed: An education in the life of Pam Ayres, poet and broadcaster

    He encouraged me to write stories and we put together a little book called Ayres and Graces. Why he picked on me, I don't know. I must have looked particularly twerpish. One of my earliest memories at my C of E primary school…
  • The Third Leader: Country matters

    Well, some have suggested shock tactics: compulsory listening to The Archers, for example, or a country citizenship test, in which all migrants would have to demonstrate a sound knowledge of flitching, fletching, thatching,…

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