Question for any and all parents out there!! Please read need help!?

It shows a lot of maturity for you to be inquiring about feelings, etc... I am a 23 year old mother and full time student. I was on birth control when I got pregnant so it was a huge suprise for my now husband and I. I was TERRIFIED! I never wanted kids. Never felt like I would have the time for them. I had never even held a baby! Luckily, my family and husband were supportive. I found out EVERYTHING that I could about what it meant to be a mother, babies, etc. keeping in mind that having one of my own would be the ultimate learning experience. It is normal for you to be nervous or scared, especially because it was not planned. I have turned out to be a great mom and love it so much. It really helped me to cope with it by educate myself about the process of having a baby and the care that they take. It is a lot of responsibility but so worth it. If you are afraid that you or your girlfriend will not be able to do the things that you had planned with your life, look at it this way, it is a baby not a crippling disease. Having a baby does often change peoples' priorities but usually for the better. Approximately 4 months into my pregnancy I started getting excited about having the little one. Please read as much as you can on babies. Baby magazines are good to read because they often have real life stories in them. It does get better. The hardest thing is time management but you only have 2 choices, deal with it or don't. You have to adapt and you will. I hope that you continue to be there for your girlfirend because she is just as nervous and scared as you if not more so. She actually has to get the baby out :) The only things that have changed in our lives are that we are obsessed with a baby named Lillian, we can't spend our money on everything that we want, and we have to plan to go out. I took a year off from school and have now started back full time and getting ready to complete my biology degree than go to pharmacy school. I know that you guys can do it. If you or your girlfriend have any questions don't hesitate to ask. Not only are you gaining additional love in your life but more maturity as well. Not bad at all if you ask me :) Well, good luck to you, your girlfriend, and baby!

What you're experiencing is common? Anything new is frightening because you don't really know what to expect. The best thing you can do is pray that Christ transforms you over the next few months and the many years to come into the kind man who we be a honorable, patient, loving, caring father a child needs. A father who is compassionate and gentle yet not afraid to correct and discipline your child. If you don't have a prayer life, get one along with studying the Word because you want to speak prayers of health, blessings, protection, and prosperity over your child from this day forward until yours or yours child's physical death.

The next thing you should do is take action to prepare yourself. Do some research on the internet or the library about pregnancy. Learn what the mother of your child and your child is going through. If you do this, you will not take the mother of your child's mood swingss personally. You'll understand it is part of the hormonal process. Also, learning about the different stages of development will give you a better appreciation for life. So make sure you get to some of those doctor appointments with her so you can so the sonograms.

Make the mother feel special. As she gets bigger, she will feel big and unattractive. Tell how beautiful she is and that you love her frequently and do little things to show her you appreciate and you're looking forward to the baby. You can start this by recognizing she's a mother this year by getting her a mother's day gift. Love on her and the baby if she let you by rubbing on her belly, singing to both her and the baby, sing and reading to the baby.

Start saving money. If you know someone who has an older baby, see if you can purchase some of the supplies you may need for younger baby from them. Go to garage sales to shop for a baby bed frame, etc. Start registering on baby websites that offer coupons on baby products.

If the mother and baby will live with you, get as much sleep as you can get because for the first few months there won't be much ZZZ's you'll enjoy.

Reach out to men who have little ones or who currently have a female pregnant and men who have successfully trained their children into responsible adults. Express to them your fears and concerns and ask them how they addressed them. Think of this as an opportunity to interview men who can be a resources to you when you're baby arrives. Knowing you have a mentor and peer fathers to help you through the process will take some of the uneasiness off.

I suggest you get some hands on experience with a baby if you haven't experienced caring for a child. If you know anybody with baby, spend sometime with that person and the baby. Have that person teach you how to hold a baby properly when they can't support their head. Hold the baby, practice feeding and learn the technique for burping a baby, and learn how to change a baby's diaper. If you do this, you will be able to start loving on that baby right away.

This is just a start. You'll be alright and you'll learn you're way. You'll make mistakes but we all do. The best thing you can do is learn and do better.

God bless you, the mother, and that sweet precious baby!

It is normal and in fact, it is good that you are scared. It is a huge responsibility but the fact that you are scared and looking for help shows that you will step up and see that things are taken care of. There are some great books out there that you can check out. Keep in mind that these are just a guide and you will be able to figure out what to do and how to do it. My husband was very scared when we had our first baby as well but within a few days of our son arriving we were both feeling like pros. Kids are great, every day you learn something new right along with them. Good luck to you!

I was young when i had my son and so was my husband really young but we was scared for no reason at all ...I wish now that i would have simplified it so i could enjoy the pregnancy and family ideas and look forward to having that little bundle of joy instead of worry and fright,,,I would advice you to simplify it and enjoy it all ...It's a baby just a little you and her ..it isn't that expensive to have around somehow the needs get met...as for being a good parent for most of us it comes natural although i think we all learn as we go ( which isn't all bad it's really fun too ) I would share this with her if i was scared because she probably is scared about giving birth also but when you tell her make sure she realizes you are not going to panic and run like too many dads do because it would be the worst mistake of your life if you love her try focusing on all the wonderful things you can do for and with this baby having a new born around is tiring with feeding and diapers but it's worth it all ...your basic worries will end up being financial if you have to pay child support and health insurance but you can always work a bit more if you need or cut back on some of your waste money to make ends meet but a baby isn't something to be scared of it isn't that major i know the world will tell you it is ...but as long as you are there to love her and the baby and take care of them the rest will be fine please simply a baby - feeding - diapers - clothing - health insurance you got it from there it goes on from year to year but just make sure you raise it with good qualities what your child learns from you is how you can expect it to behave. The reason people claim it to be a huge responsiblity is because you have to give up some of your fun and time to raise that child and you have to keep it in things it needs other than that enjoy and talk to her honestly will help you get it off you chest and help her if she needs to talk too.

It's normal to be scared when expecting a child. You worry about if the child is healthy, how you're going to support them, if you'll be a good parent, will you know what to do, and other things like that.

Just don't let it stop your from being the best parent you can be. There is help out there. Take some parenting classes, read some books, talk to other parents and most importantly talk to your girlfriend. I would bet she's just as scared as you.

It's normal to feel this way, and your girlfriend is probably scared too. Being responsible for a baby can seem overwhelming but the good news is that it DOES get better.

How did I deal with those feelings? With alot of help from my husband, and just "hang in there". You & your girly need to support each other unconditionally.

It's very normal. Your girl friend probably has many of the same fears as you. It's hard but very rewarding. I am pregnant with my second and some times I feel very panic. Like "what am i doing" Ahhhhhhhhhhh" !!! It happens to every one just be supportive to her and do your best and you will not be sorry. Good Luck.

The first few months are tough but after that you'll get used to your child, he'll get used to you, and you'll ove watching him grow, change, and become his own person.

talk to her