Posts Tagged “first responders”
first responders
So it's shiny. It's new. It turns sideways or something! But also you can only send 200 texts a month, which is patently ABSURD, and it doesn't have instant messenger. So it is essentially a tiny, pretty Mac brick that takes phone calls. TAN and Blakeley asked the peoples that you meet on the street so that the coolhunters can work from home today.
first responders
The pundits have had their say on whether or not Mike Bloomberg can be elected president. Now it's time to see what real New Yorkers think about the whole thing. The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvass the voters. More »
Bloomberg For President
The pundits have had their say on whether or not Mike Bloomberg can be elected president. Now it's time to see what real New Yorkers think about the whole thing. The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvass the voters. More »
first responders
This week The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvas the area to see what New Yorkers really think about the greatest plague of the age: man boobs. More »
Gynecomastia
This week The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvas the area to see what New Yorkers really think about the greatest plague of the age: man boobs. More »
first responders
Yesterday, hotel heiress and vehicular freestylist Paris Hilton was released from prison after only three days due to an undisclosed medical condition. What does this say about the legal system in our society? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley stepped outside to survey the surprisingly well-informed citizenry of Manhattan. More »
Paris Hilton's Early Release
Yesterday, hotel heiress and vehicular freestylist Paris Hilton was released from prison after only three days due to an undisclosed medical condition. What does this say about the legal system in our society? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley stepped outside to survey the surprisingly well-informed citizenry of Manhattan. More »
first responders
Lindsay Lohan has made a little news lately, what with all the cocaine-having and out-passing and car-crashing and rehab-entering. How do New Yorkers feel about the highly-publicized struggles of one of Long Island's most famous citizens? We stuck The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley out front of the office and wouldn't let them back in until they found out. More »
Lindsay Lohan: The Coke, The Crash, The Rehab, The Response
Lindsay Lohan has made a little news lately, what with all the cocaine-having and out-passing and car-crashing and rehab-entering. How do New Yorkers feel about the highly-publicized struggles of one of Long Island's most famous citizens? We stuck The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley out front of the office and wouldn't let them back in until they found out. More »
first responders
In this holiday edition of First Responders, our man on the street segment, The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley find out how New Yorkers are planning to spend their Memorial Day weekends. Except TAN never showed—you know how black people are—so Blakeley was forced to fend for himself. The result? What may very well be the best episode yet! More »
Memorial Day
In this holiday edition of First Responders, our man on the street segment, The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley find out how New Yorkers are planning to spend their Memorial Day weekends. Except TAN never showed—you know how black people are—so Blakeley was forced to fend for himself. The result? What may very well be the best episode yet! More »
first responders
This week saw the passing of Jerry Falwell, preacher, teacher, and moral majoritarian. How did New Yorkers react to the loss? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley hit the street to hear the good word. More »
Jerry Falwell: Still Dead
This week saw the passing of Jerry Falwell, preacher, teacher, and moral majoritarian. How did New Yorkers react to the loss? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley hit the street to hear the good word. More »
first responders
Yesterday, a sad and staged publicity event took place outside our office. The "protest," aimed at "freeing" Paris Hilton, drew shockingly few spectators. Most of them, in fact, were press, including such luminaries as the Sun's Lenore Skenazy and the Post's Mark Bulliet. But what did average New Yorkers think about the whole thing? Since The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley only work within 50 feet of the office, they came out to ask the hard questions. More »
Free Paris Hilton. Or Don't, Who Cares?
Yesterday, a sad and staged publicity event took place outside our office. The "protest," aimed at "freeing" Paris Hilton, drew shockingly few spectators. Most of them, in fact, were press, including such luminaries as the Sun's Lenore Skenazy and the Post's Mark Bulliet. But what did average New Yorkers think about the whole thing? Since The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley only work within 50 feet of the office, they came out to ask the hard questions. More »
first responders
Today, with little fanfare, Columbia Pictures releases the emotionally restrained art house film Spider-Man 3. ("The actors are unconscious. The writing is barely legible," raved Rex Reed.) We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to see if the public is super-stoked for the cinema this weekend. More »
Ya Hear About This Spider-Man Movie?
Today, with little fanfare, Columbia Pictures releases the emotionally restrained art house film Spider-Man 3. ("The actors are unconscious. The writing is barely legible," raved Rex Reed.) We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to see if the public is super-stoked for the cinema this weekend. More »
first responders
New York City Hates Rosie O'Donnell
Rosie O'Donnell is leaving 'The View'. What does this mean to the man, and wo-man, on the street? We dispatched The Assimilated Negro and Julia Allison's Personal Director of Photography to find out.
More »
first responders
First Responders: Virginia Tech
The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley take to "the street" to get that all-important New York City random-person viewpoint on violence in high schools, fear of Asian Americans, and exactly what's wrong with America.
More »
clips
The great and the good have all spoken on the Imus affair; what of the common man? How does he or she feel about the aging radio personality's unfortunate remarks? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
First Responders: Don Imus
The great and the good have all spoken on the Imus affair; what of the common man? How does he or she feel about the aging radio personality's unfortunate remarks? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
clips
If you've read Jalopnik—or seen the endless stream of posts they send over our way, some of them tangentially related to New York—you'll know that this is the week of the annual New York Auto Show. But what do New Yorkers know about cars? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
First Responders: New York Auto Show
If you've read Jalopnik—or seen the endless stream of posts they send over our way, some of them tangentially related to New York—you'll know that this is the week of the annual New York Auto Show. But what do New Yorkers know about cars? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
clips
You may or may not have heard—there's been so little coverage of it—but a new Whole Foods opened at Houston and Bowery this morning. What sort of person shops there, or sulks angrily outside? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
First Responders: Whole Foods
You may or may not have heard—there's been so little coverage of it—but a new Whole Foods opened at Houston and Bowery this morning. What sort of person shops there, or sulks angrily outside? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »
clips
First Responders: Bad Bosses
We've spent the last few weeks sharing your stories of unpleasant employers. But what of the man and woman on the street? Surely they have equally tragic tales to share. We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley onto the streets of New York to find out.
More »
clips
First Responders: St. Patrick's Day
As St. Patrick's Day rapidly approaches, Irish folks everywhere are getting an early start on wife-beating and gay-bashing. But is everyone else planning to celebrate? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley out into the wide world to investigate.
More »
clips
First Responders: The 'Village Voice'
Sure, the Voice has been in the news quite a bit over the last week, but does that resonate with the public at large? We dispatched The Assimilated Negro and Gawker videographer Richard Blakeley to take the pulse of the Voice's alleged audience.
More »
clips
First Responders: The Oscars
As part of our deeply-held belief that the wisdom of crowds is always more impressive than the analysis of experts, we sent The Assimilated Negro and Gawker videographer Richard Blakeley about town to solicit your opinions on Sunday's Academy Awards ceremony. These are your stories.
More »