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Posts Tagged “first responders”

first responders

Are You Buying An iPhone?

So it's shiny. It's new. It turns sideways or something! But also you can only send 200 texts a month, which is patently ABSURD, and it doesn't have instant messenger. So it is essentially a tiny, pretty Mac brick that takes phone calls. TAN and Blakeley asked the peoples that you meet on the street so that the coolhunters can work from home today.

9:20 AM on Wed Jun 27 2007
By Choire
2,964 views, 11 comments

first responders

Bloomberg For President


The pundits have had their say on whether or not Mike Bloomberg can be elected president. Now it's time to see what real New Yorkers think about the whole thing. The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvass the voters. More »

1:50 PM on Fri Jun 22 2007
By abalk
1,780 views, 14 comments

first responders

Gynecomastia


This week The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley canvas the area to see what New Yorkers really think about the greatest plague of the age: man boobs. More »

3:30 PM on Fri Jun 15 2007
By abalk
3,403 views, 4 comments

first responders

Paris Hilton's Early Release


Yesterday, hotel heiress and vehicular freestylist Paris Hilton was released from prison after only three days due to an undisclosed medical condition. What does this say about the legal system in our society? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley stepped outside to survey the surprisingly well-informed citizenry of Manhattan. More »

12:56 PM on Fri Jun 8 2007
By abalk
3,089 views, 9 comments

first responders

Lindsay Lohan: The Coke, The Crash, The Rehab, The Response


Lindsay Lohan has made a little news lately, what with all the cocaine-having and out-passing and car-crashing and rehab-entering. How do New Yorkers feel about the highly-publicized struggles of one of Long Island's most famous citizens? We stuck The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley out front of the office and wouldn't let them back in until they found out. More »

11:58 AM on Fri Jun 1 2007
By abalk
5,138 views, 20 comments

first responders

Memorial Day


In this holiday edition of First Responders, our man on the street segment, The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley find out how New Yorkers are planning to spend their Memorial Day weekends. Except TAN never showed—you know how black people are—so Blakeley was forced to fend for himself. The result? What may very well be the best episode yet! More »

11:35 AM on Fri May 25 2007
By balk
3,002 views, 20 comments

first responders

Jerry Falwell: Still Dead


This week saw the passing of Jerry Falwell, preacher, teacher, and moral majoritarian. How did New Yorkers react to the loss? The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley hit the street to hear the good word. More »

1:57 PM on Fri May 18 2007
By abalk2
2,741 views, 14 comments

first responders

Free Paris Hilton. Or Don't, Who Cares?


Yesterday, a sad and staged publicity event took place outside our office. The "protest," aimed at "freeing" Paris Hilton, drew shockingly few spectators. Most of them, in fact, were press, including such luminaries as the Sun's Lenore Skenazy and the Post's Mark Bulliet. But what did average New Yorkers think about the whole thing? Since The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley only work within 50 feet of the office, they came out to ask the hard questions. More »

1:20 PM on Fri May 11 2007
By abalk2
6,130 views, 12 comments

Latest by LisaB: That handheld camera is making me seriously dizzy. more »

first responders

Ya Hear About This Spider-Man Movie?


Today, with little fanfare, Columbia Pictures releases the emotionally restrained art house film Spider-Man 3. ("The actors are unconscious. The writing is barely legible," raved Rex Reed.) We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to see if the public is super-stoked for the cinema this weekend. More »

3:28 PM on Fri May 4 2007
By abalk2
3,043 views, 7 comments

first responders

New York City Hates Rosie O'Donnell

Rosie O'Donnell is leaving 'The View'. What does this mean to the man, and wo-man, on the street? We dispatched The Assimilated Negro and Julia Allison's Personal Director of Photography to find out. More »

4:19 PM on Fri Apr 27 2007
By abalk2
4,530 views, 13 comments

first responders

First Responders: Virginia Tech

The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley take to "the street" to get that all-important New York City random-person viewpoint on violence in high schools, fear of Asian Americans, and exactly what's wrong with America. More »

1:21 PM on Fri Apr 20 2007
By Choire
4,555 views, 33 comments

clips

First Responders: Don Imus


The great and the good have all spoken on the Imus affair; what of the common man? How does he or she feel about the aging radio personality's unfortunate remarks? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »

5:00 PM on Wed Apr 11 2007
By abalk2
4,461 views, 15 comments

clips

First Responders: New York Auto Show


If you've read Jalopnik—or seen the endless stream of posts they send over our way, some of them tangentially related to New York—you'll know that this is the week of the annual New York Auto Show. But what do New Yorkers know about cars? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »

2:01 PM on Fri Apr 6 2007
By abalk2
2,082 views, 8 comments

clips

First Responders: Whole Foods


You may or may not have heard—there's been so little coverage of it—but a new Whole Foods opened at Houston and Bowery this morning. What sort of person shops there, or sulks angrily outside? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley to investigate. More »

4:55 PM on Thu Mar 29 2007
By abalk2
5,852 views, 19 comments

clips

First Responders: Bad Bosses

We've spent the last few weeks sharing your stories of unpleasant employers. But what of the man and woman on the street? Surely they have equally tragic tales to share. We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley onto the streets of New York to find out. More »

3:30 PM on Fri Mar 23 2007
By abalk2
1,588 views, 9 comments

clips

First Responders: St. Patrick's Day

As St. Patrick's Day rapidly approaches, Irish folks everywhere are getting an early start on wife-beating and gay-bashing. But is everyone else planning to celebrate? We sent The Assimilated Negro and Richard Blakeley out into the wide world to investigate. More »

2:00 PM on Fri Mar 16 2007
By abalk2
4,817 views, 17 comments

clips

First Responders: The 'Village Voice'

Sure, the Voice has been in the news quite a bit over the last week, but does that resonate with the public at large? We dispatched The Assimilated Negro and Gawker videographer Richard Blakeley to take the pulse of the Voice's alleged audience. More »

1:35 PM on Fri Mar 9 2007
By abalk2
2,081 views, 19 comments

clips

First Responders: The Oscars

As part of our deeply-held belief that the wisdom of crowds is always more impressive than the analysis of experts, we sent The Assimilated Negro and Gawker videographer Richard Blakeley about town to solicit your opinions on Sunday's Academy Awards ceremony. These are your stories. More »

3:15 PM on Tue Feb 27 2007
By abalk2
2,678 views, 17 comments