He's Texting for Sex?

DEAR MARGO: I'm a 34-year-old woman currently going through a divorce, not finalized yet. The problem is I married 'til death do us part. He moved in with my neighbor and her daughter three weeks after I moved out. They now share a different house together, and he claims he's not sexually active with her. He has been texting me lately that he would like to be with me, sexually. I responded to him in a sarcastic way saying that our neighbor must not be all that good.

I then wrote him that I missed him and would like to go to marriage counseling together. He didn't respond to that. We were married for 13 years and have two beautiful children. I don't want to end up a statistic, but he's leaving us no choice.

What should I say to him the next time he writes me a sexual text message? I am going to counseling and divorce class through our church. I am trying to move on, which is why I moved 1,000 miles away to start over. I'm so confused. I feel played over . . . again.

--- HANGING ON

DEAR HANG: Alas, my dear, you may have married 'til death do you part, but your about-to-be ex had other ideas. It is clear to this neutral observer that a man who lives in not one, but two houses with the neighbor lady is cohabiting with her -- in every sense of the word.

For him to text for sex but ignore your request for marriage counseling tells you everything you need to know. As for what to say the next time he sends a sexual text message, tell him he isn't even on your top-10 list.

And stick with your divorce class and counseling. I predict you will land on your feet and be just fine. There is a certain satisfaction to turning down horny toads.

--- MARGO, ASSUREDLY

The Girlfriend Wears Prada

DEAR MARGO: I am lucky enough to still be close friends with my college roommate, some dozen years later. In that time I've become a wife and mother and work part time at a job I enjoy, but which is clearly second to my other roles.

She, on the other hand, is very focused on her career, and single. She is making a vast amount of money. (More than my spouse and I combined!) The problem is that in the past few months she's started to call me several times a week wanting to discuss her new favorite topic: herself.

The subjects are her expensive haircuts, trips to spas, wardrobe makeovers, new car, etc. My husband says I am merely envious, but it's more that her conversations seem like reading a fashion magazine; there is nothing of any depth.

She is an interesting person, and I would much rather hear her thoughts on her job, current events, even the movies she's seen. What is the best way to handle this situation?

--- DROWNING IN THE SHALLOWS

DEAR DROWN: If you think the girl you knew and liked for all these years is still under the expensive haircut and the fancy clothes, tell her, next time she calls, that the fashion scene and luxury expenditures don't interest you a lot, but you would love to chew over the political scene, movies she's liked, etc., because you remember the great talks you used to have.

If she doesn't get the message, the friendship has run its course. (And what's up with your husband? It doesn't sound like he knows you very well.)

--- MARGO, ESSENTIALLY

Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via e-mail to dearmargo@creators.com. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered. To read more about Margo Howard, click here.

COPYRIGHT 2007 MARGO HOWARD
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.

Next: My Sister-In-Law, Little Mary Sunshine

Previous: When Tough Love Meets Self-Preservation

• Email Story
• IM Story
• Printable View

RECOMMEND THIS STORY

Recommend It:

Not at All Somewhat Moderately Highly Very Highly

Average (Not Rated)

» Recommended Stories