Hey Dad,

Last night I had a dream.

It wasn't one of my usual, recurring dreams … like when I show up for algebra class in my underwear, fly like Peter Pan, or my teeth fall out one at a time. But, this lifelike dream has left me shaken and pondering.

It involved my two eldest sons and me. Apparently, we pulled our van behind this rundown building near a clump of scraggly trees.

For some reason, I needed to go get something, so I left the boys at an old picnic table, telling them that I would be right back. Then the dream got weird with me running across the street with a plastic rocket, trying to outwit a potential bad guy, being sniffed by a horse-sized dog, and finally making my way back though a tangle of trees and brush.

Towards the end of the dream, I remember feeling this urgent need to get back to the boys but knew that hours had passed since I had said I would be right back.

In my dream, I exited the tangle of trees and looked around to see if the boys were there. In the dim light, I could see two small forms sitting at the table coloring pictures. Feelings of shame and guilt washed over me as I walked closer to the table.

They never looked up, but I could sense their disappointment. Then I saw my eldest son's face. He was busy coloring, but his eyes were red and tears were streaming down his face. He was scared but was trying to be brave. He felt betrayed but tried not to show it. I was the one they looked to; I was the one they counted on … and I had let them down.

Then I woke up, but even now, I still "feel" the pain I caused them in my dream.

Now, I know it's just a dream, and I'm not into dream interpretation … but I still can't shake the thought that maybe there is some truth in the sad dream. Maybe I have let my children down. Maybe I've been too preoccupied with "my" stuff lately. Even yesterday, Sam (10) asked again, "Dad, when are you going to give me drawing lessons? You said you were going to a long time ago."

We hear that a lot don't we, Dad—"When are you going to … ?"

They're counting on us, depending on us … and too many times we say, "I'll be right back"—only we aren't.

So, I'm going to keep thinking about "The Dream" and maybe you should too. Maybe it's God's way of reminding you and me that we need to slow down and be there for our children.

Sleep tight.

You 'da dad,

© Copyright 2005 Todd Wilson. Used by permission.

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