Hey Dad,

Hope you had a great Fourth of July. We went to my in-laws' lake cottage. I ate too much, played out in the sun with my family, and enjoyed the rocket's red glare and the bombs bursting in air. About the only bad part of the weekend was the odd feeling that came over me early on the morning of the fourth.

With the sun shining, the sky as blue as can be, and the water warm, I was basking in the sun when I noticed something … disturbing. One of my nephews ran up to Alan, my brother-in-law, and asked, "Dad, can I go skiing?"

"Sure," he answered cheerfully. A little too cheerfully for my liking. He walked down the long pier, uncovered the boat, gathered the skis and life jackets, untangled the rope, and then took them skiing. I would have said, "Maybe we can tomorrow."

Later that night, one of the older kids asked Alan, "Dad, can we help light some of the fireworks?" Ha! I knew they were way too young for something like that and was flabbergasted when he said, "Sure." I would have responded, "Maybe next year." While watching their fireworks display, a feeling of "dad-envy" crept over me.

The next morning Alan again said, "Sure," to a boat ride, more skiing, AND fishing.

By the last day, I had discovered one of Alan's secrets to fathering—he says "Sure" a lot.

Fifteen minutes later, the chance came to try out my theory. I was on the front porch enjoying the shade when my four year old asked to go on a jet ski ride. "Sure," I said, pleased with my convincing tone.

Later Alan asked, "You want to go 'tubing' with me and the kids?"

"Sure," I said. I was glad I did—and so were my kids.

You know, maybe it's time for us dads to say, "Sure" more often. When your son wants to shoot some hoops, say, "Sure." When your daughter wants to talk about her future, say, "Sure." When your wife asks you to fix the broken screen, answer, "Sure!"

You may not feel like it, but say it anyway. No excuses or "I'll do it later" … just, "Sure."

Try it out for the next two days. Not only will your wife and kids enjoy it, but so will you. Who knows? Maybe with a little practice, Alan's fathering secret will become yours too. You 'da dad! [Todd]

Copyright Todd Wilson, 2004. Used by permission. [7/09/04]

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