Woooohooo! Debbie says she'll sign the contract release form! I am so excited. Melissa and I are applying for a variety of teaching positions- all of them working with adults! It would be so wonderful to stay in Korea; I wouldn't have to give up Tae Kwon Do. One man from a school in Pusan has already e-mailed us back- he wants to have a phone interview! We're going to get to leave Wonderland!

****

Something very uncomfortable happened at work today. Debbie and Susie were in the teachers' office talking with Neo in Korean. Melissa and I were sitting at our desks. This is what we heard: "Blah blah blah migookan, blah blah blah migookan, blah blah blah Melissa-teacher blah blah blah Jane-teacher blah blah." This was kept up for about five minutes. Without the occasional 'Jane-teacher' and 'Melissa-teacher' thrown in, we would have understood from the 'migookan' that they were talking about us. How rude of them to blatantly discuss us in front of our faces. I wanted to stand up and scream at them; I wanted to let them know, in case they hadn't noticed, that I was sitting right there. But, in the interest of not pissing Debbie off, since she says she'll sign the employer release, I sat quietly and fumed. I am glad that I will be getting out of this place. I want to go somewhere where I will be treated with at least a modicum of respect.

****

The school in Pusan has all but guaranteed us the job. One of its representatives will be in Daegu in a few weeks, and he wants to interview us in person! This is so wonderful.

****

I have caught the dying-dog cough from Stacey. Melissa and I have seriously begun to worry about the possibility that Stacey, and now I, may actually have tuberculosis. We have done a bit of research online, and this is what we've found out: In most cases, when a person's body comes in contact with TB, his or her immune system is able to fight off the bacteria. However, under conditions where the person is under stress or in poor health, the immune system is unable to fight the bacteria. I have been sick off and on since I landed in Korea, and as for stress… TB is generally spread through close contact with an infected person, through such circumstances as living together. As I type, I can hear Stacey coughing. We have learned that there is a special type of TB called bovine tuberculosis, and that one may be at risk of exposure to it in under-developed countries. Bovine TB is spread via un-pasteurized milk, yogurt, etc. The milk here is not pasteurized. Neither Melissa nor I drink it, but Stacey drinks it constantly. This is the list of the complete set of TB related symptoms:

1. A cough that will not go away
2. Feeling tired all the time
3. Weight loss
4. Loss of appetite
5. Fever
6. Coughing up blood
7. Night sweats

I have the first five of those, though I suppose that the coughing up blood is the problematical part, and the symptom most likely to scream "you have TB!" at me. Maybe I don't have TB, but I certainly feel miserable. And ever time I cough I can feel bits of my lungs shredding. And to think that Debbie and Susie won't allow me to go to the doctor. How can anyone hear this cough and think that I am fine?

****

The germs causing my cough have spread. Today I not only wheeze as I breathe and sound like a dying animal when I cough, but I sound like a mime when I speak. Yes, I have lost my voice. Now, they've been telling me daily that I am perfectly fit to teach and don't need to see a doctor, but you would think that my inability to communicate might tip them off. I doubt if anyone noticed though. Instead of curling up in bed and drinking hot tea with honey, I was, as usual, subjected to my daily nine hours of screaming children, and, as usual, I was expected to control them. Susie walked by my class of six year olds. I was attempting to conduct class with a whisper, though they were running wild, apparently under the impression that since I wasn't yelling at them as per usual, this must be some sort of play-day. Susie stuck her head in and demanded to know what was going on. I whispered that I had lost my voice.
"What?!"
"I've lost my voice." (whisper)
Susie looked around my classroom, said a few words in Korean, and as the children suddenly sat quietly in her seats, she said to me, "You need to keep your classroom under control." And with that she slammed the door and, no doubt, walked directly to Debbie's office. Spending an entire day of no-voice trying to stretch my vocal chords into working has probably damaged them irreparably. I have no doubt that my throat will ache tomorrow.

****

This is ridiculous. According to Neo, during the month of November all of the Foreign Teachers have to take pronunciation classes from Susie! Apparently, Susie informed Debbie that her pronunciation is better than the pronunciation of all of the Foreigner Teachers, and that she needs to teach us how to pronounce words correctly, so we will be able to teach the kids correct pronunciation. Granted, Susie has the best pronunciation of all the Koreans at Wonderland, but when she speaks she has a decidedly Korean accent! And she is to teach English pronunciation to Native English speakers? Her time would be better spent conducting a pronunciation class for the Korean Teachers, who could actually benefit from such a thing. And of course, we will not be paid for attending these classes. I have decided to refuse to attend. It's ludicrous.

****

October 31, 2001
I honestly believe that today was the worst possible day that I have had at Wonderland so far. It started out wonderfully. Today is Halloween. While Halloween isn't a holiday celebrated in Korea, since it is an American holiday, it was celebrated at Wonderland. Halloween is always one of my favorite holidays, and Melissa and I had been looking forward to it. Since Halloween and Activity Day were to be combined, this was the first Activity Day we hadn't approached with dread. We got dressed in our costumes: Melissa dressed as Medusa (sort of an inside joke, since several of her students mispronounce her name and it comes out as Medusa), Stacey dressed as Pippi Longstocking, and I dressed as a Mouse. During each period, the entire school would be led on a Halloween parade around Daegok Dong (totaling four parades in all). Following the parade, each individual class would make a presentation in front of the rest of the school. ("My name's Becky and I'm a Princess" etc.). It had sounded like fun to me.

Well, remember Steve, the horrible trouble maker? Every day since September Eleventh he has been saying that he is Bin Laden, and asking things like, "Jane Teacher's parents, twins building?" while miming a dead person with an evil smirk on his face. While I believe that fourteen year olds are old enough to know what they're doing is wrong, we are, as a culture, told that they are not. And since I long ago realized that Debbie would be of no help in a disciplinary situation, I have tried for a month and a half to ignore Steve. Today, he and his buddies dressed up as Osama bin Laden and his terrorists. They marched to the front of the classroom and announced who they were. They proceeded to say things like "Die Americans!" and "Die Jane-Teacher!" while pointing their fake guns towards me and Melissa. I know we are supposed to excuse this behavior in children, but I expected that Debbie, or one of the Korean-Teachers would take the "Osamas" aside and talk to them. Explain to them that what they were doing was insensitive, offensive, rude, and hurtful. What I didn't expect for them to do was laugh. Debbie and the rest of the Koreans laughed like it was the funniest thing they'd ever seen. They continued laughing as Melissa ran out of the room in tears. They continued laughing as I, shaking with rage, stood up and demanded that someone make them stop. They even addressed Steve as "Osama" for the rest of the day! How can they think that the death of thousands is something to laugh about? How can they think that "Die Jane-Teacher!" is funny? While I don't like it when Steve says these things to me, I can do my best to ignore him. But for Debbie and my Korean co-workers to think that the idea of my death is hilarious? It makes me want to vomit.

And do you know what Debbie had the audacity to do after this little event? She informed us that she had reconsidered her decision to sign our employer release forms. She told us that she really needed us to stay through the end of February, and besides, the mommies really like Americans. We told her about the potential job in Pusan, the job we had lined up for January first, and she told us that we could probably just find a different job. She didn't seem too concerned. There is some sort of bait and switch treachery going on here. She tells us she'll sign the form at the end of December in order to prevent us from packing up and ditching Wonderland in the middle of the night, then a month later, she says no, not December, February. What will it be in a month? March? May? June, when our contract legally ends? I must talk this over with Melissa. Debbie is still under the misapprehension that she can trap us here against our wishes and force us to continue participating in the white slavery that is our job. I don't know why we ever thought that she would play fair and release us at the end of December. We should have known she would pull some sort of stunt like this to manipulate us into staying longer. Why should we stay in a place with such underhanded double dealings going on? Why should we stay somewhere where our boss, supervisor and co-workers find the deaths of Americans amusing? I want to get out.