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Factual Magic on Julia's Ad Work, Celebs' Tax-Free Swag and Who Writes Hit Songs

by Leslie Gornstein | Feb. 12, 2005

Does Julia Roberts do the voice-over for the America Online commercials? What other celebrities do voice-overs and don't necessarily want, or get, the publicity?
  Jennifer Helton, Louisville, Kentucky

Man, AOL must have some dirt on Julia to make her do those silly ads.

A.B. Replies: You mean you just want a list? Like what they put in the phone book? Do I look like Billboard magazine to you? Go bother Seacrest if you want stuff read from a card.

Yes, that is a croaky, slightly exhausted-sounding Julia that you hear hawking a better Internet or whatever it is they sell at AOL. She sounds about as enthusiastic as Dick Cheney on Take Your Daughter to Work Day, doesn't she? Well, what do you expect from a gig that won't let Ms. Roberts show off her magnificent teeth or her uncanny ability to connect with audiences the world over--and whatever else the press kit says she does?

Still, Julia probably earned plenty of scratch for that minimum amount of work, not that AOL would ever say that. Beyond acknowledging Julia's pipes in the company's ads, an AOL flack had no comment for this B!tch on anything having to do with the commercial. Not even a statement deciphering the purpose of that dried-up little man who inexplicably shows up toward the middle of one of the spots, staring down at the camera from a stadium seat or something. Is he the embodiment of a virus? Should we cower?

"Voice-overs are a great way for celebrities to earn money with minimum fuss--a couple of hours in the studio with no cameras," says Jonathan Holiff, who matches celebrities with endorsement deals through his L.A. company, the Hollywood-Madison Group.

"And, for those big stars who don't want the publicity that comes from actually appearing in commercials, it's the only way to get in the game," he says. "Another notable example from last year was Robert Redford for United Airlines."

Anyway, Julia and Robert join a whole slew of A-listers who, 10 years ago, would've rather eaten their Indian-grown hair extensions than shill for beer, credit cards or the sodie pop. Some living legends (according to Gene Shalit) like Brad Pitt, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Kate Beckinsale, Salma Hayek and Robert De Niro have even lent their images to their endorsements.

De Niro recently shot an American Express commercial in which he moons about in New York sucking in the innate drama of the old neighborhoods. Scorsese shot that one. And Michel Gondry, the guy who filmed The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, shot those Coke commercials with Beckinsale and Adrien Brody walking around looking expensive.

Oh, wait. All this reading must give you dry heaves. You wanted a list. Here's a list of all the even halfway interesting celebrities who did commercial voice-overs last year, care of Holiff:

• James Caan for Burger King
• Sean Connery for Level 3 Communications
• Michael Douglas for the United Nations Foundation
• Richard Dreyfuss for Honda
• Jeff Goldblum pulling a double whammy for Apple and Toyota
• Ed Harris for UPS
• Tommy Lee Jones for SBC
• Steve Martin for Merrill-Lynch
• Will Smith for Coca-Cola
• Donald Sutherland for Simply Orange

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Look for the next installment of Answer B!tch Sat., Feb. 19