December 12, 2005

December Dokdo post

By Korean law, I have to post something about Dokdo every month and proclaim my belief, nay, unquestionable knowledge that those rocks do indeed belong to Korea.

Here is a picture I swiped from the Kushibo site which I find appropriate for the occasion.

Tokto_at_last_supper0


By the way,I wouldn't know about this kind of thing, but I hear that if a foreigner wears a "Dokdo Belongs to Korea" T-shirt, he has to fight off the women with a stick.

Violence5Unfortunately, these kind of women usually look like this (you might want to keep that stick handy). These dainty little lasses are protesting the statue of Macarthur, that Yankee bastard who prevented the Koreas from unifying under the divine lordship of Kim Il-sun. I'm sure they have enough hate and loathing in their hearts for Dokdo protests as well.

Link_dance_team_1Contrast, if you will, with the LINK dancers; activists who are protesting for something actually worthwhile (human rights for North Koreans).

I'll leave you all to draw your own conclusions.

December 09, 2005

World Cup Draw

The World Cup draw was announced early this morning (Korea time).

The States finds itself in the same bracket with Italy, Ghana, and the Czech Republic. Korea will be going against France, Switzerland, and a mystical land called Togo (which I believe is next to Narnia).

Knowing as much about soccer as the next American does (read: almost nothing), I'll follow the sage advice of the bookies and  boldly claim that neither America nor Korea stand much of a chance of getting past the first round.

America will be thrashed by the obnoxious but good-looking Italians and will lose a close one to the obnoxious and less good-looking Czechs. They will get a measure of revenge against Ghana, but will still only win by one goal as it will take a while before they realize that black athletes outside the US tend to suck.

Korea will be thrashed by France to the delight of all Southern Europeans who want payback for World Cup 2002 'irregularities' in officiating. The Koreans will also fall to the peace-mongering Swiss, whom they played recently in Korea (it doesn't bode well if you only draw with a team in a 'must win' friendly game held on your home turf, IMHO). However, those Togons (Togoese? Togots? Togotons?) are going down hard!

Fearless Prediction:

Italy wins the World Cup!

I see Brazil falling to Italy in the final game. Brazil chokes when they play the big games in Europe (they got blanked by the French in 1998, for hell's sake). England chokes in the big games regardless of where they play. Germany is capable of choking on their home field (I'm going all the way back to the Munich Olympics on this one, so take that with a grain or two of salt), Argentina is, well, Argentina, and God is still punishing the French for being opposed to the Iraq war.

Wait a minute. On second thought, I'm going with France to take it all.

Fearless Prediction 2: Japan, who finds itself in the same division with Brazil, Croatia and Australia, will be outscored in their division 12 to 1 (the one goal coming from a ball accidently deflecting off an Australian defender's head into the the net).

Fearless Prediction #3: England will surpass the expectations of even the greatest cynics by drawing with Trinidad and Togago. Beckham will particularly suck in that game.
Datugly
Fearless Prediction #4: Ronaldo will keep his World Cup streak alive as the ugliest player on the field.


Danceyoufool

Speaking of his Royally Ugly One, here are a few pictures to remind us that soccer is not a real sport played by real men.

Umthanks
Soccerisgay
Click to see them in all their fruity splendor!






The odds:

11-4 Brazil 13-2 England 7-1 Germany 8-1 Argentina, Italy 10-1 France 12-1 Spain 14-1 Netherland 18-1 Portugal 20-1 Czech Republic 28-1 Sweden 40-1 Mexico 50-1 Croatia, Ukraine 66-1 Ivory Coast, Poland 80-1 Switzerland 100-1 Serbia&Montenegro, U.S. 125-1 Australia, Ecuador 150-1 Japan, Paraguay 250-1 Ghana 300-1 South Korea, Tunisia 400-1 Angola, Togo 500-1 Costa Rica, Iran 750-1 Saudi Arabia 1,000 Trinidad&Tobago.

November 23, 2005

Protesting being denied a reason to protest

ProtesthabitAn article from the Chosun

Bereaved families of victims killed during a deadly rampage at a front-line guard post, protest trial procedures in front of a martial court in Yongin, Gyeonggi Province, saying that the trial was wrapped up hastily, without doing anything to relieve people's distrust . /Yonhap


And what grave injustice were these families of the slain protesting? Private Kim Dongmin was found guilty of premeditated murder and was sentenced to death. 

Meanwhile at the courthouse, bereaved families knocked chairs around and yelled at the court in protest at the ruling, saying the military had manipulated the case and the trial was wrapped up hastily.

Just can't please some people, I guess. That must have been a somewhat bizarre moment for the court when they realized the people throwing the tantrum were those that had the ruling go in their favor.

I know, it was a terrible trajedy and I shouldn't belittle them considering the immense pain and agony they must be going through, but isn't protesting a trial that went exactly the way you wanted it just a tad too much?

It's a Korean thing, I guess.

Anyway, the case will be appealed and in the end I'm sure Kim will just be sentenced to life, which is as it should be in my opinion. Let him spend the rest of his long life seeing if life in prison is a step up from serving 2 years in the military. Let him rot in prison long enough for his conscience to start gnawing at him once he's mature enough to see what he's done.

November 20, 2005

Secrets of the Korean Rich

An article I found through connectkorea (pretty much a dead site these days) a long time back. I started to write up a post, saved it half-finished as a draft, and then forget about it for a while. Fortunately for all of you who yearn to be rich without having to go through the usual route of actually working hard and coming up with an innovative thought, I found it and now here it is.

While expecting the usual 'Rich Dad, Poor Dad' advice that we've grown accustomed to on this topic, I was delightfully surprised to find this 'research' was from one Dr. Moon Seung-yeol who exemplifies Korea's special brand of home-grown scholarly logic. 

Some of the more entertaining entries:

3. The wealthy live longer. They say the more money you have and the higher your position, the less stress you suffer and the longer you live. But research has shown that rather than absolute size of their fortune, people’s lifespan is determined by whether they have the confidence that they are better than the rest.

Research has shown you live longer if you are confident you are better than everyone else? Is this an explanation why Korea men have the lowest lifespan among developed countries?

Anyway, that's great news for me. As a typical white American male, I assume this means I will live to the age of 150.

And do the French EVER die?

4. The wealthy respect their partners as investment consultants and advisors, rather than merely as wives or husbands.

Perhaps, but I don't think this respect gets in the way of rich ajoshis dropping a few million won a night at a dallanjujum or banging their secretaries.

5. The rich have "wealthy lines." The faces of the rich are lined owing to the fact that they are always smiling, Dr. Moon observes, apparently fixed in a rictus of permanent glee at their own success.

Bill_gates_windows_xpKind of makes you want to start hating rich people, don't it?

Is this for real? Do rich people really have more 'smiling wrinkles' that the average Joe? My feeling is that our good 'Dr.' is just making this shit up as he goes along.

8. The wealthy invest in their children's education. The ratio of incoming Seoul National University students who are the sons of wealthy white collar workers is growing by the day.

And the less-wealthy people in Korea do not give a damn about their childrens' education?

I would replace the words 'invest in' with the word 'buy'. The rich move to Kangnam to get their kids in the best schools, shell out a lot of money on private tutors and send their children abroad to master English to see to it that their spoiled kids stay above the unwashed masses. This 'secret of the rich' sounds more like a 'fuck you' to all families of lower incomes who can't afford to compete with the well-off.

9. Red is a symbol of wealth. The color denotes passion and strength and contains hope, says Moon.

And?

How exactly is this a 'secret' of rich people's success? Do rich people claim red as their favorite color? Do rich people wear red more often (assumedly not, as #7 on Moon's list states they wear 'understated clothing')? Do they always bet on red when playing roulette? What the hell is the point here?

11. The wealthy look south. Even in the most expensive locations like the Tower Palace in Seoul's Gangnam district, prices can differ by up to W600-700 million (about US$ 600,000-700,000) depending on the direction the apartment faces. The most expensive ones face south. Anyone who has lived in a north-facing apartment in the northern hemisphere knows why.

Ok, rich people pay more for houses/apartments that face south, thus getting more sunlight. What other shocking 'secrets' of rich people will Dr. Moon tell us about next? That they prefer BMWs to Ticos? They usually eat in expensive restaurants rather than Mcdonalds? They don't buy their Rolexes from some guy selling watches out of a suitcase by the subway station? They wipe their asses with pricey 2 ply toilet paper rather than bargain brands? 

Unless Dr. Moon is alluding to geomancy, I'm not sure of the relevance of this information.

12. The wealthy are born in mid-winter. Four out of ten of Korea's wealthy were born in winter according to the Gregorian calendar. This phenomenon holds true outside of Korea as well. 10 of the 40 self-made men selected by the business magazine Fortune were born between late December and late January.

Shocking. I thought they would all be born in the year of the Pig, in accordance with ancient Chinese superstition wisdom.

Interesting trivia though. A little note to the good doctor, however. Coincidences happen, especially with a low sample size. If I flipped a coin ten times, it is not out of the question for heads to come up 8 times out of 10 in one particular stretch. However, if I continue to flip that same coin a few hundred more times, soon we will see that our early 'finding' was wrong. Let some competent researchers who know what it means to conduct a study with true random sampling and appropriate sample size and I'm sure we'll find that this is bullshit.

I looked up the birth months of the top 10 richest men of all time and only one, Paul Allen, was born in December or January.  Warren Buffett was born in August, as was Lawrence J. Ellison and John Jacob Astor. Cornelius Vanderbilt was born in November, as was Andrew Carnegie. And the richest man in the history of the world, John D. Rockefeller, was born in July (the same birth month as this decidely unrich blog author).

Hmm, according to my 'research' it is better to be born in July or August. Could have fooled me.

Fleshpickletrump

By the way, though Donald Trump was born in June, a hairdresser capable of taming that abomination on his head is still yet to be born.

 

Here's another example of this silly kind of research, suggesting that people who's surnames are on the first half of the alphabet are more likely to be rich (I can just see millions of Koreans named "Park" and "Seo" scrambling to change their names to "Choi" now).
  
Would you like to learn more about how to become rich? Dr. Moon is a 'consultant' who runs his own 'Rich School' program for morons   enterprising people who believe that such 'success' programs can actually do something (other than make the person running said program richer).

Someone please tell me that this entire article is not just a paid-for advertisement by the good Dr. Moon. That's one characteristic of wealth he did NOT mention: knowing the value of sleazy and shameless self-promotion.

November 15, 2005

Suffer the children

317peepeeCommenter Giant Panda left a link to this picture, which I deemed worthy of its own post.

As always, click on the pic to enlarge.

Typically the models in these kinds of pics get more attention than the actual product being shown. In this case, however, someone else steals the show.

Now some people may look at this and criticize the mother for not having the decency to take the kid 10 meters away to the restroom to do his business, but I say if they can avoid dribbling, then pee away. Anything before the age of 5 is fair game.

November 12, 2005

Kimchi folklore revisited

Sales of kimchi and sauerkraut have reportedly spiked due to claims that kimchi can fight the Bird Flu virus.

An agriculture official at the Korean Embassy in Washington, Kim Jae-su, said despite growing concern over the hygiene and safety of kimchi in Korea following a recent parasite scare, many U.S. media reported the virtue of kimchi in treating bird flu, and sauerkraut manufacturers were trying to boost sales by riding on the coattails of that popularity.

The 'virtue' of kimchi in treating bird flu is based on ONE research study that the researchers themselves admitted was not conclusive. That was back in March and things have been fairly quiet since then, which seems more than a little odd. The only thing I found was this and this. (basically, a month ago they shipped off some special 'kimchi-feed' to an Indonesian zoo. Why wait for scientific verification before making a little money, eh?)

But even if no further research comes out to prove the theory, or even if research comes out that disproves the theory (though I doubt the Korean media would be bothered to report on it), the myth that kimchi cures yet another deadly disease will be etched onto the collective consciousness of the Korean people.

Kimchilady

This lady's name just happens to be Adi Kimchi. She's a professor in a cancer research institute.

Hasn't anyone told her that to find the cure to cancer she has only to look to her surname? I mean, could God give her a bigger clue to solve the mystery of her chosen life's work?

I hear she actually smells rather pleasant, by the way.

Anyhoo, sauerkraut has the same bacteria strain that researchers extracted from kimchi for their research (conducted on sick chickens, by the way. I guess they couldn't get the chickens to eat kimchi in its normal, stinky state).

If this research actually pans out, which choice do you think the average westerner will choose?

A. Spicy cabbage that smells and tastes like it was left to rot in a jar for several months (because, well, it was) and leaves your breath with that sharp 'garlicious' tang that makes the ladies weak at the knees (and stomach)?

B. A product they are already familiar with that DOESN'T stink up the entire refrigerator, despite being placed in 5 separately sealed airtight containers? 

Bestofthewurst

The best thing about sauerkraut, of course, is that it is often encountered in the vacinity of a big piece of greasy meat (not to mention an obnoxiously large can or glass of German beer).

--

More from the article:

 “Last year, when kimchi drew attention for its efficacy in curing SARS, which hit Southeast Asia, the U.S. media took no interest,” Kim said.

The first clause of that sentence is 100% 황소똥. There never was a single study that even suggested kimchi could do anything for curing or preventing SARS. It was a complete fabrication of the Korean media (not the scientific community in Korea, save for a few people trying to pass themselves off as scientists) that I've already covered in detail here. If the U.S. media took no interest in that piece of uber-nationalistic folklore, well, then I guess it's nice to know that occasionally they can do something right.

Gocorea_2

This pic has no real relation to this post, other than the fact that I got it from a site called 'kimchiLand.org.

This is the only kind of Corean nationalism I am interested in seeing.

Kimchigirl_1
And if sketchings don't do it for you, how about a picture of a doll some girl named 'Kimchi Girl'? Kimchi girl is the one on the right, by the way. The other is Pattie.

She has taken the pics off of her blog. You'll have to type 'kimchi girl' into a search engine to find the rest of this fascinating collection.

--

But who am I to tell you kimchi doesn't cure and/or prevent everything from AIDS to the Black Death? Join the Faith and double up on your kimchi if you feel you must. Oh, and make sure it isn't any of that poisonous Chinese kimchi (especially the kind that comes from Korean companies that moved their plants over to China to take advantage of the more 'reasonable' wages and health standards the Chinese pride themselves on).

As for me, I'll stick with my own proven diet of Burger King Whoppers, galbi, 'Mexican' fried chicken and the occasional Krispykreme doughnut that has kept me free for 30+ years from AIDS, SARS, bird flu, and every other disease save the common cold and flu. Say what you will, but I've got just as much 'proof' that my diet fights every serious disease known to man as kimchi does for it.


 

November 08, 2005

KTU Sunshine

All photos and captions swiped from Korea Times, which, by the by, is now 17.4% less shitty since Lee Kyoung Hee stopped writing editorials (or whatever the hell you called what she did).

Bushed_1
"This is a part of a controversial video posted on the Web site of the Korean Teachers’ and Education Workers’ Union. The video criticizes the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) forum, the U.S.-led Iraq war, and the free trade agreements."

It's nice to see that the good people at KTU are working hard to bring Korea into the world of globalization. I'm not sure exactly what the Iraq war has to do with free trade and APEC, but then I guess I wasn't properly educatified.

If you wonder where this fine group of educators gets their marching orders inspiration, check out this wonderful curriculum from other fine examples of teachers in Korea.

Now who says that Chung Dong Young should be criticized for protecting a patriotic regime like that?

Goodluck"Members of a civic coalition, including a students’ parents group, call on unionized teachers to accept a new teacher evaluation system during a press conference in central Seoul, Tuesday. The system will allow students and their parents to evaluate teachers’ performance at 48 schools nationwide on a trial basis."   /Yonhap

Naturally, the KTU is threatening to go on a mass strike to thwart this attempt to actually make them accountable for what they do in the classroom.

"However, the Ministry of Education and Human Resources Development said that it will take strong action against any attempt by the union to walk out during their working days to participate in the demonstration."

Hmm, could 'strong action' possibly indicate a good beatin'? Please? Come on Roh, look how they ridicule your noble image. Doesn't that make you want to see some heads cracked open? At least just a few?

ShitbagWhere do these KTU people come from? Unless I am mistaken (and honestly, what are the odds of that happening?) most hail from Cholla province. Here's another guy who originally hails from Cholla (me thinks, I should probably look that up rather than just assume he hails from the same place as where his father is buried, but folks, this is just a fuckin blog and I ain't exactly paid by the hour here...)

What is this, you say? A Korean-American originally from Cholla province stabbing the good ol' USA in the back? Unthinkable!

A little tip to US immigration officials: When considering whether or not to grant citizenship or a visa to a South Korean and you see the word "Cholla" anywhere on his* personal documents, just veto it right there and send him back to the "We Hate Everyone and We Don't Even Think Much of Ourselves!" demo he just recently came from.

*Yes, I intentionally use the male pronoun here. If the applicant is female, the authorities should follow standard protocol by only letting her into the country if she's hot.

November 02, 2005

Tick tock

Like most people, I keep a list of the top 30 or so people in the world I would most like to see die a spectacularly gruesome death*.

For the past decade or so Kim Jong-il has been in the top three (he alternates with Bob Saget and Bill Keane, the writer of Family Circle).

Deathclock_1
I entered Jong-il's personal data on the death clock site and found out that about this time 9 years from now Kim Jong-il should leave his Worker's Paradise behind to join his father in another Paradise (not much different in many ways than how North Korea is now, I'm sure). 

The exact date the site gave me was Thursday, November 27th, 2014.

Now wouldn't that be a Thanksgiving to remember?

That date may be wrong though, as I'm unsure of his Body Mass Index. I know that he is a manly 5 foot 3 inches, but I couldn't find his body weight and just guessed. If anyone knows, please inform me and I'll reenter the numbers and adjust the above date if needed.

Humble Proposal

Once we have the exact date determined, I propose that the Kor-Blogger community hold an annual "Ding Dong the Dictator will soon be Dead" party to mark the upcoming Happy Day.

I further propose that this celebration be held in a pub in Seoul, since as we all know, anyone who is anyone already lives here (our 'provincial' blogger friends such as Nomad and Joel are certainly welcome to come as well, just as long as each of you promises to put on a clean shirt and try not to embarrass us by spitting, scratching yourselves, or doing any other act of uncivilized behavior you might have picked up from the locals).

Ep106_kim_jong_ii_must_dieon_set_1

It's the final scene, fat boy. Here's hoping you go out painfully and shamefully.

[Picture taken from Comedy Central's "Kim Jong-il Must Die." Anyone heard anything about this? Looks like a hoot.]

*Preferably caught on video, so I can download and edit them primarily by speeding them up and dubbing in cartoon sound effects at appropriate moments, tastefully done, of course

October 29, 2005

Completely ignorable post

Nothing worth reading here, people. Just move along...

200510280012_03_1
Kim Hee Sun claims place among screen goddesses

Actress Kim Hee Sun, best known for her role in...well...some lame to mediocre Korean movie or the other, has now joined the ranks of world famous actresses such as Audrey Hepburn and even Audrey Hepburn. How did she secure such a lofty place on the world stage? By having her picture taken by the same photographer who once took pictures of Madonna, that's how. (Oh, and then having a Korean newspaper claim that this actually should mean something) This picture book, titled "Marvelously Kim Hee Sun," will soon hit store bookshelves from Seoul to as far away as Busan and maybe even one or two stores in Hong Kong. You can rush out to the nearest bookstore and buy it now, or just wait for it to show up half-price in the bargain bins in about 2 months.

Korea could cut troops in Iraq by a third!

200510280017_00...and no one would care!

Korean 'peace keeper' in Northern Iraq, keeping a vigilant watch of the entry to the base PC bang, safe within their compound protected by Kurdish soldiers.

Philosophical question: If Korea sent 3,000 troops to Iraq and nobody there even noticed, did it really happen?

Speaking of Iraq, a certain semi-retired Korblogger has left some messages here and there around the Korean blogosphere about the lack of coverage of US troop casuality numbers exceeding 2,000.

Well there you go again, KP, always looking at the negative side of things. How about acknowledging the bright side for a change?

For example:

Of those 2,000 killed, not one was the son or daughter of any politician who supported the Iraq war. This is a great improvement over previous wars in which politicians foolishly allowed their beloved children to put themselves in harm's way, just because they felt the war was a just cause.

Despite the government racking up a record deficit that will only get larger, thanks in big part to the Iraq liberation, no major US corporation has suffered any financial losses. In fact, several have even increased profits dramatically!

Speaking of the deficit, any day now all the money put into the Iraqi cause (see here for a running tally) will be paid back with interest by grateful Iraqis. Once the Shiites are firmly in control of Iraq then everything will be just fine. I'm sure they'll prove to be great friends of the US and Israel for generations to come, just like their tribal brothers from the country to their east. It's all good baby!

Now, considering the bright future that lies ahead of us, isn't this sacrifice of 2,000 young lives well worth it?

October 16, 2005

more photo fun

In lieu of a post with actual content...

Dontsuck"We don't completely suck!"

Korean soccer team beats soccer powerhouse Iran 2-0 in friendly match.

19841984 Forever

North Korea celebrates 60 years of Glorious Rule of Kim il Sun and his runty successor. Coincidently, 60 years is about how long we'll have wait for the Sunshine Policy to finally result in real changes in North. Patience my dear friends, patience.

GodisdeadG.O.D. is (finally) dead
Korean pop group sensation G.O.D. announces retirement.
And there was much rejoicing...

EnglishHangeul Day organizers give away Hangeul T-shirts in exchange for English language T-shirts. [If I owned a single shirt with English on it, I would have been there myself. Wonder if anyone traded in a 'Be the Reds" T-shirt...]

FlysingaporeReason 217 not to fly with any Korean airline.

Korean airline flight attendants (presumably female)






DogsoutWho let the dogs out?




JihyunJeon Ji Hyeon at the premier of her latest movie (Daisy something or the other).
It's been five years since she's been in a movie that hasn't flopped miserably, leaving analysts to wonder just how long she can keep her career afloat based solely on the talent of her ass [I give it 3 more years]Robbed

Robbed.

On the left is the South Korean runner up in Miss Asia pageant, standing next to the 'winner.' I guess the cross-dressing drag queen look is in vogue these days.




NerdfightNerd Fight!

And you didn't think there was anything more boring to watch than a Taekwondo match...

OnoApparently the embodiment of evil himself Apollo Ono won some ice skating competition in South Korea.
Strange, but I couldn't find any photo of the competition in the major Korean media outlets other than this one...





October 10, 2005

Greater China

A few news items that caught my eye.

China deports 7 North Korean refugees.

``China confirmed that it deported the seven refugees to North Korea on Sept. 29,’’ a ministry official told reporters. They had hoped to come to Seoul, he added.

Unification Minister Chung Dong-young expressed regret, describing the deportation as ``very shocking.’’


Yes, very shocking indeed. This coming from the same man who recently claimed that

South Korea will "stop allowing large groups of North Korean defectors to enter South Korea, saying that government has no desire to undermine the communist country’s leadership."

  Dong

Chung Dong-young  struggling to keep a straight face while expressing his  'regret'  over North Korean defectors being sent back to North Korea.



And secondly, China continues to rewrite history at Korea's expense.


The Chinese Foreign Ministry in August last year erased reference to some pre-1948 Korean history on its website, and now all accounts of pre-modern Korean history, including the Koguryo kingdom, are gone from a world history textbook for ethnic Korean- students in Yanbian, Jilin Province.


Remember how Korea freaked out when nearly 1% of Japanese schools adopted a controversial history book that glossed over Japan
s mistreatment of Korea? Remember?

About 50-60 percent of Chinese middle schools use the Chinese version of the world history textbook. China struck the Korean parts from the Chinese version in 2003.

Expect the streets of Seoul to be filled with angry demonstrators, flaming Chinese flags and severed fingers.

Or maybe not. After all, this isn't one of the Great Enemies of Korea like Japan or the U.S. Why make any fuss? It's not like China has ever justified taking over another country by claiming it once belonged to Chinese history...

Seriously though, why would China bother doing this if it were NOT keeping the option open of absorbing a large chunk of North Korea if the Nork regime collapses? Any competing hypotheses out there I'm not aware of?

And the MacArthur statue 'controversy' gets more press than this?

September 17, 2005

강아지 똥

Just watched this animation on EBS and felt inspired to blog on it.

Happylake_142
Yes, it's an animation about a sad little piece of dog crap that struggles to find its sense of self worth. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll never look at a pile of dog shit on the sidewalk the same way again.

2taijiangmaThings look up for our stinky little hero when he runs into a wise piece of sage poo (perhaps excreted by a Bhuddist monk or Christian missionary? Don't know, didn't see this part).

하느님은 쓸데없는 물건은 하나도 만드시지않으셨어
너는 무엇인가 꼭 귀하게 쓰일거야

"God doesn't make any useless thing. You certainly have some noble use."

You can find more pictures of Doggy Poo's adventure here.

I don't want to give way the ending, but if you caught Southpark's 'Circle of Poo' episode with Mr. Hanky and his little turdlets, you'll have an idea of how little Doggy Poo is able to make embrace his state of shittyness.

Dukylo69_19I believe Doggy Poo first appeared on the stage as a play for children. I don't know who the actor was who played the lead role, but I'm sure having acted in the role of a piece of shit on his resume did wonders for his career. I bet he has some interesting stories on how he researched the part before bringing it to life on stage.

Esmom_50
Just look at the enthused faces of these children who are lucky enough to get to see the play. Do you think in the back of their minds these children wondered why their parents felt like they needed to see this play? What kind of heartfelt talks did they have with their parents after seeing it?
"Though it's true that you may be just a lowly turd, can't you see that if a piece of dog shit can find happiness in life, maybe there's hope for you as well?"


Speaking of shit, here
s a site chock full of it (no, its not Dog Stew, it seems that Kim Jeong il finally pulled the plug on that one).

It's a listing of all Korean dramas (136!) including main actors and storylines. Just scrolling through the list and thinking of the thousands of people who put this shit together and the millions who wasted precious time and brain cells watching them made me reconsider my normally optimistic world view. That these shows are spreading to other countries is truly a
tragedy of Jerry Springer, Baywatch and WWF proportions.

We need to keep in mind that though the Korean wave of movies hitting Asia may be well and good, the Korean Shitwave of god-awful pop music and television dramas is an entirely different thing. Contrary to what the makers of Doggy Poo would have us believe, not all shit has a worthwhile purpose.


September 13, 2005

Back to the front

I'm back. Sort of...

As you might have guessed, my Asiana flight went through despite the strike (God bless the scabs!). Does anyone know what happened with that by the way? Honestly, if Asiana bent over and took it from those pilots, I swear to God Almighty I will never take an Asiana flight again and shun those who do.

I returned a few weeks ago, but my mind hasn't really returned to Korea yet. I looked through the Korean blogs and caught up on things, but I guess I just need my vacation to last for a few more weeks, if only in my head, before I get back to bloggin on Korea proper.

No problem getting back to eating Korean food though (not that I didn't thoroughly enjoy eating food in the States that's hard to find here: good steak, pot roast, Texas-style barbecue, and I don't care what anyone says, yo quiero Taco Bell).
My food of choice upon returning to Korea was the controversial (among expats) naengmyeon. I slurped down that stuff daily for several days.

Hanhooy_20And I know this sounds like one of those "you know you've been in Korea too long when..." lines, but I've been eating a lot of soondae (stuffed pig intestines) lately as well. I detested this stuff for the first few years I was here, but now it's my favorite vendor snack. Be sure to click on the picture to the right to increase the size of the picture by about 1%.

Betty417_87When I start liking beondaegi though, I hope my family and friends care enough about me to run an intervention and drag my ass back to the States. Click on that mofo to see the wonder that is beondaegi in all its nauseating splendor.


More posts to follow soon...