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MafferDragonhand
Reviews
Small Time (1996)
Very good film
This film is a low-budget piece, with actors you've probably not heard of. But...they manage to put it all together well.
Ben, a gangster, is told by a partner in crime that he will be getting a chance at "real" work. Ben will take a suitcase full of cocaine into a shack in the desert and simply wait a few days for the buyer to arrive. This buyer is known only as "the Dutchman." Ben will receive $100,000 for the drugs; he will be allowed to keep $35,000 of that money as payment.
Ben decides to bring along two male friends who also happen to also be amateur gangsters. Characteristically, Ben lies to his friends and says he's being paid $20,000 and that they'll split the 20k three ways. (No honor among gangsters, I suppose!) That part always makes me smile; it shows Ben to be very clever and deceitful. What's more, it leads to a hilarious speech, to wit: "I didn't even HAVE to tell you guys I was being paid twenty thousand dollars for this deal! I could have lied and said I was making TEN thousand, and you'd STILL have begged me to let you come along!" Ben is a pathological liar, but the director happens to exploit that aspect of his personality in a few humorous scenes.
Trouble starts almost from the beginning. When they stop for gas, despite the fact that they have some money with them, Ben's boneheaded friend Jesus decides he just doesn't feel like paying for anything and robs the store. As their car races away, the owner fires a shotgun at them; piercing the gas tank and essentially trapping the three at their pickup point. Jesus doesn't stop there. He decides to invite a few lady-friends over for a party the first night and everyone, except Ben, who is horrified at this gross incompetence, starts helping themselves to the cocaine. The next day; bored, thirsty, and upset at the situation, Ben starts to see visions of an Indian holy man in the desert.
This movie has some funny moments; mostly because it doesn't TRY to be funny. These characters are so incompetent you can't help but smile regardless of what they're going. There aren't many cliché's; the characters seem well-rounded to me. Though the ending is a bit on the unoriginal side; it neither impresses nor disappoints. Highly Recommended. I hope this movie is re-released on DVD soon.
Nietzsche (2003)
Interesting
This film opens bluntly. "God is dead" says one character. From there, the two characters who sit alone at a table debate existentialism from Nietzsche, to Kierkegaard, Sartre. The basic structure of their discussions hinge on Nietzsche's idea that man is a lowly creature; then to Kierkegaard saying life has no structure; and back to man, this time in Sartre's opinion.
The setting and score are kept simple; we don't want to be distracted by things other than the conversation. At first it seems there's little story structure; it's essentially two people debating, we don't know why or what it's supposed to accomplish. This lacking could, however, tie in with all that they are discussing in a between-the-lines manner.
There is also a lot of cursing in this film. So no kids! The ending both binds everything together and breaks it apart. Not expected, but cliched. But the dialogue is good. I'm glad to see other people my age not only read but also understand philosophy.
Most will probably dislike this one, but since I'm a philosophy major, I sympathize and give it 7/10. But then, what did Nietzsche say about pity?
Hercules and the Amazon Women (1994)
Great start to a great series
When I was eleven, in 1994, television was my life and books on the Greek myths were my obsession. I must have seen this episode five times back in '94. Each time, I felt very sad by the end. It was a great story, and "Hera" looked so evil & chilling. I won't ruin it by telling you the end. But the story is basically of a town Hercules has to save from constant attacks from Amazon women. Sounds boring, but trust me it isn't, it has a lot of fighting action! Lucy Lawless (who later appears in the "Hercules" spinoff "Xena: Warrior Princess") guest stars here. It is also an honor to have the infamous Anthony Quinn playing the role of Zeus.
UFO - Enemy Unknown (1994)
About a missed gem
UFO - Enemy Unknown (or _X-Com: UFO Defense_, as it is called here in the U.S.) ... really is hard to describe accurately. I can and can't recommend this game. It takes hours of dedication, but once you get into it you will surely dedicate thousands of hours of your life to it.
The music is extremely beautiful; a combination of military beats with "techno" melodies to merge Earth-based music with "futuristic" music that might appeal to a Martian. You fight about 6 different hostile alien races: the famous Zeta Reticuli race is here (called "Sectoids" in the game); there are reptilian aliens ("Snakemen"); creepy death look-alikes with awesome mental powers ("Ethereals"); and tough jock-types ("Mutons").
You have armored vehicles at your disposal (but so do the aliens), and even though you start with puny Earth-weapons; as you shoot down, recover, and research alien technology you can build base facilities, aircraft, tanks, weapons, body armor, grenades, EXTREMELY high-explosive missile launchers--and even equipment for MIND CONTROL--based on alien technology.
At the end of each month, you're given a progress report. Nations decide if they should increase your funding, decrease it, leave it the same, or pull out of the alliance all together and try to strike a deal with the alien races.
The ground battles themselves are played in a chess-like state. The "board" is divided into (I think) 124x124 squares; each one square taking 4 "Time Units" to cross. The average soldier starts with 50 TU's. However, shooting takes between 15 & 45 (depending on weapons used & type of shot--aimed, auto, snap etc.). Basically, everything--reloading, throwing stuff, turning your soldier's head--takes TU's. But, as your soldiers see more combat, they can get as much as 81 TU's, which is quite helpful. They also gain health units, stamina, strength, bravery, etc--but keeping a soldier from the first mission to the final assault on the main ET base (in the Cydonia region of Mars) is pretty much impossible. You're fighting a well-trained enemy!
Each group of 25(?) squares is given it's own unique attribute, so you'll NEVER (I, in 6 years of playing had not) come across the exact same map twice. The aliens are positioned randomly through the map as well.
There are a few videos in this game, the two outstanding ones are when you win the game. The other being when you lose. When you win, no indication is given of Earth's future state. Do we achieve peace on Earth? Do we forget all that we've been through & return to our old ways? Unsure. You just see the Mars base exploding, and your brave soldiers flying back to Earth cheering. Then you are returned to the main menu. Did the designers intend to create such a profound ending?
The video when you lose is even more mind-boggling. Three alien battle-ships hover over the UN building. Inside, the floor is bare of representatives except for a few humans sitting at a table across from two "Ethereals" and a "Sectoid" commander. There is no talking, but the message is chillingly beautiful in it's clarity: most of the world has given in, and it looks like the last fighting nation is following. As the humans & aliens communicate telepathically, several aliens burst through the door, place a plasma rifle to the head of the human leader, and pull the trigger. The "sectoid" across from him is seen splattered in the man's blood. Proof that the aliens do not make deals--deals, in the sense that we know them--and a taste of what the aliens have always had in store for us: extermination.
This game is no longer in print, apparently because people saw it as "too intelligent." If you happen to find a copy on ebay...consider buying it. I make no promises that you'll like it. The "others" tell me it's a boring & tedious game. I consider it an highly intelligent work of art; one that shaped my teen years. I will always cherish X-COM.
House of Buggin' (1995)
Definitely underrated!
House of Buggin', staring John Leguizamo, was proof of the importance of advertisment. If you weren't living in NY, Miami, or LA most of your life, the show might have been alien to you. Even so, you couldn't help but smile at the spoof of Ricki Lake, featuring a verbal exchange between 'Fidel Castro' and 'Gen. Manuel Noriega.' I often looked forward to "Iggy & Loco's 'Totally True Urban Legends.'"
Other hilarious skits bore titles such as WomYn; Vogu-E; a skit where the show's actors enlist in "Big Brothers" who bully the kids they're assigned to, as well as a dramatic re-telling of a 'true' story where Rap music turns an All-American boy into a gun toting, brutal gangsta and a 'vice-versa' story where John Leguizamo's character is kidnapped by Hasidic Jews and converts (during the blindfolded/smell-test, he guessed everything that was put under his nose to be a pork food product--hehehe!). An entertaining slam of everything that has anything to do with inner-city life.
I have fond memories of this show, and am saddened by it's short life. Hopefully, reruns will one day grace Comedy Central.