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Photo By Sean Hughes/photopresse.com
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Ryan Huth (above), owner of Dari-Crest in Latonia,
can't wait for the lazy, hazy days of summer.
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Flying saucers, wagon wheels, cyclones, zebras, glaciers, freezes, floats and slushes. The Big Dipper, Whip Dip, Zip Dip, Dairy Corner and Korner Cone. Summer images as true blue, white and red as little league and drive-in movies. Uncompromising journalists to the end, we went on assignment to several neighborhood dairy bars in a Herculean effort to bring CityBeat readers a sugar cone of Americana while -- we believe the appropriate term could only be -- gorging ourselves into a hot fudge coma. It's a sticky job, but we'll do anything to get the story. Now all we need is a mud puddle.
Kute kones and kuter kids
We're fortunate in our Northside community to have two neighborhood dairy bars: J.F. DAIRY CORNER and PUTZ'S CREAMY WHIP (OK, so the latter is officially in Westwood; we've claimed it as neatly as Cincinnati claims Newport and Covington). While they both have similarities -- family owned-and-operated for-ev-er, items like Foot Longs, Banana Splits, Floats and Par-Fays (ice cream layered with fruit topping, not to be confused with the more complicated French version of ice cream layered with fruit) -- their main differences lie in Parking Lot Activity and Really Kute Names.
J.F. Dairy Corner wins hands down for both. If you like to eat your Choco Taco to the rhythm of street poetry or tha-wack of skateboards, J.F. is the place to hang, or, um, chill. As much as I love their Root Beer Floats (small, $1.25), my own personal quest at J.F. this summer is to try every item with either a bizarro name (Itzakadoozie, Lick-A-Color and Dora the Explorer with Gumball Eyes) or flavor combinations that appeal either to 5-year-old children or heavily medicated adults (Raspberry Banana Watermelon Slush Par-Fay with Reese's Pieces and Twinkle Kote sprinkles). I keep meaning to order the Cole Slaw in a Cup (50 cents) because I'm fascinated that they have the business savvy to advertise and serve it that way. Oh! And the pink ice cream bar in the shape of a baseball mitt holding the bubble-gum baseball -- I'm getting that too.
As get-down and downtown as J.F. is, Putz's Creamy Whip is, well, I think the name says it all. You gotta love a place named Putz's, and several hundred rosy-cheeked, cleated, padded and jerseyed children with trophy-hugging dads will attest to its family-friendly parking lot on any summer night (I'm convinced Putz's parking lot is where minivans breed). Note the words several hundred.
On our most recent visit (a chilly 42-degree weeknight), I counted 60-ish heads slurping their way through extra thick shakes and methodically licking Funny Face Cones. (I immediately recognized the You're-Not-Funny face that stared back at me when I asked if the cones resemble Barbra Streisand). So what if 10 a.m. is the only time to avoid the crowds at this popular dairy bar? You've never started your day with breakfast on a stick and a head rush? -- DONNA COVRETT
A nostalgic cruise
The town where I grew up had no movie theaters or bowling alleys, but there were two dairy bars -- at opposite ends of town. My high school social life might best be measured in the half-mile distance between them. Occasionally I'd grab fries or a milkshake, but mostly the dairy bars served as two poles of a highly evolved social activity ("cruising") whereby kids piled into cars and drove back and forth through town in search of adventure.
Both places have closed, overshadowed by the introduction of golden arches to the town's architecture. A friend and I were happy to discover this isn't the case in Cincinnati after an entire afternoon spent cruising several creamy whips.
We hopped in the car with a full tank of gas, a Ramones CD and an agreement to stuff ourselves silly with junk food. Proof of dairy bar prosperity was evident with kids counting nickels to see what size cone they could afford, grandparents taking their grandkids out for banana splits, couples sharing hot fudge sundaes and teenage employees snapping bubble gum while handing our order out the window.
Our favorite place was the ZIP DIP in Bridgetown. Its selection of heat-and-serve and pull-the-lever foods is pretty standard: beef BBQ, burgers, fries, nachos, chili-cheese fries and dogs and soft-serve ice cream and frozen yogurt. One unique highlight is the Orange Jubilee ($2.50), fresh-squeezed orange juice with vanilla ice cream.
But it's old-fashioned charm that sets Zip Dip apart. An original 1950s-era neon sign -- a lightning bolt across an ice cream cone -- still perches proudly on the roof. The parking lot is shady and clean, and the building's exterior is freshly painted.
With the exception of a mushy burger, everything we tried was great. Sweet and tangy BBQ beef and cole slaw ($2.15), a cream soda float ($2.10) and vanilla ice cream in a crispy, homemade waffle cone. Maybe it was brain freeze or a sugar buzz, but slurping the last of that delightfully pink and gooey float I had the rare sensation of being happy to be an American, the tingling sort of feeling a child gets listening to the national anthem before a baseball game. -- EMILY LIEB
Blueprint for tradition
I assembled a crack crew of architects to accompany me to DARI-CREST in Latonia. These folks not only know ice cream, they have an eye for beauty -- and when they saw the banana boat and sundaes come out of the window, there were ooohs and ahhs all around.
I had the Shake-a-Sundae (small, $2.30; large, $2.90), a unique treat I heard about years ago when Latonia natives first turned me on to the Dari-Crest experience. My favorite, the black raspberry pineapple, combines the sophistication of a black raspberry shake with the sweet nuance of pineapple topping. Inspirational.
The Banana Royale ($2.75) comes in a plastic rowboat (bonus points), and the banana is perfectly ripe and split lengthwise for maximum banana beauty. The traditional toppings of chocolate, strawberry and pineapple, not-too-sweet whipped cream and juicy maraschino finished it off.
Rave reviews for the Hot Fudge Brownie Sundae ($2.75)! The brownie was crisp on the outside and gooey on the inside: We suspect it was homemade. We special ordered the Turtle Sundae ($3.10) with chocolate ice cream, and the caramel topping was gooey and good. Gardeners, take note: Extra worms on any size Dirt Sundae (medium, $1.90) are an additional nickel.
We ordered hot dogs for dessert. Plain old ballpark dogs for the crew but, on the recommendation of the lady at the window, I tried the chili cheese dog. Not too messy, it hit the spot without hitting the front of my shirt.
Dari-Crest is right across from Mother of God Cemetery. I'd make the "quiet neighborhood" joke, but it's really quite lively sitting out front at the purple picnic table, watching the world whiz by. The stand is under new ownership as of last August, and they now offer 24 flavors of soft serve ice cream -- transcending vanilla and chocolate into the maple nut, espresso, pistachio and crème de menthe range.
With a new coat of pink and purple paint on the outside and more choices on the menu, Dari-Crest is still a great local tradition. -- ANNE MITCHELL
J. F. Dairy Corner
1735 Blue Rock, Northside
513-542-0111
Putz's Creamy Whip
Putz Place & West Fork Road,
Westwood
513-681-8668
Zip Dip
4050 Drew Ave., Bridgetown
513-574-6252
Dari-Crest
3024 Madison Ave., Covington/Latonia
859-261-4709
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