euphoria n. 1. A feeling of great happiness or well- being. 2. The direct antithesis of the emotion generally created by the new Humpers record, with the possible exception of the album's triumphant first track, "Steel- Toed Sneakers."

confusion n. 1. A state of mind wherein one is unable to think with clarity. 2. The state of mind that subsequently arises when one considers that the Humpers are on Epitaph Records, a label that up until recently has provided some of the finest independent music available.

anger n. 1. A strong feeling of displeasure or hostility. 2. The emotion created when one listens to tripe- ridden number like "Fucking Secretaries" and "Ten- Inches Higher," songs with about as much ingenuity as "America's Funniest Home Videos."

remorse n. 1. Bitter regret. 2. The self- hating sensation that will invariably arise if you, after having been forewarned, purchase this hollow bunk of insipid foolishness, or even waste precious moments of your life listening to it.

cheap shot n. 1. An unsporting verbal attack on a vulnerable target. 2. The insubstantial technique I'm utilizing in this review, due mostly to the convenient formula established by the album's title. (How could I resist?)

-Kevin Ruggeri