Somewhere deep in the heart of Athens, Georgia, there lies a 10-acre cornfield. Five feet from its northwest corner stands a single willow tree. One hazy Sunday afternoon, I set about reclining under this tree, when all of a sudden I heard a great rumbling. The earth beneath me seemed to completely give way and before I knew it, I was plunging towards the bowels of the earth. Descending towards what I was sure would be my demise, I blacked out.

I awoke in a brightly lit environment, surrounded on three sides by endless white space. Directly in front of me stood a gargantuan green metal gate, reflecting the mysterious light so intensely that I could barely look at it. "My God!" I said to myself. "I'm... dead!"

"Not so!"

I spun around to see where the mysterious voice had come from, and found myself face to face with six rather large elephants. To my amazement, the largest began to speak:

"Greetings, visitor. We are the six keepers of the Elephant 6 Kingdom. I am Fluffy, the elephant of kitsch."

"I am Pinky, the elephant of psychedelia."

"I am Zanzithoph, the elephant of bizarre and archaic instruments."

"I am Fatty, the elephant of dense, layered production."

"I am Friendly, the elephant of perpetually-rotating band members."

"I am Ringo, elephant of Beatle worship. And you have arrived just in time for the party."

Before I had an opportunity to interrogate the elephants, I was whisked through the green gates into a vast open field. The elephants led me to a massive circus tent that lay in the middle of the field. "We cannot go beyond this point," spoke Pinky. "We wish you the best of luck." And with that, the six immense pachyderms dissolved into a sweet-smelling mist.

"Hello? Hello?" No response, except the echo of my own voice through the distant hills. Timidly, I peeled back the curtain leading to the giant big top. The incoming flood of shapes and colors almost knocked me on my back. Inside, various creatures, all dressed in tie-dyed business suits were mingling, drinking bright green ambrosia from silver goblets. But before I could fully take in my surroundings, the ringmaster approached me. "Welcome," he said. "We've been expecting you. My name is Robert Schneider."

"How did I get here?"

"You got here through the door."

"Yes, yes, but how did I get here?"

"Ah, but the question is not how you got here. The question is, how did you get there?"

I looked around and, to my astonishment, I found myself standing on the opposite end of the circus at the base of a giant stage. Robert was nowhere to be found. A voice came from behind me:

"No time to dawdle! The band is about to play!"

"Robert! What?! What band?"

"Shhhh!"

I turned around to find that the stage, which only moments ago had been empty, was completely set up. Three skinny gents in silver t-shirts were standing on stage, guitars in hand, grinning at me.

"My name is Kevin Barnes," said a man with a guitar, "and this is my band, Of Montreal. We are going to play songles for you."

"Songles?!"

Kevin smiled. And with that, the band started their set. From the moment they began playing, I could tell I was going to dig it. Of Montreal had all the tenets of a great Elephant 6 band-– the catchy melodies, the whimsical lyrics, the marching band on acid aesthetic-– it was all there in full form. I turned to Robert, who stood next to me, eating porridge out of a tremendous pink flower.

"Bob, these guys sound great! Let me guess-– you're their producer?"

A pearl-shaped tear welled in Robert's eye. He replied, "Alas, no!"

"But Bob! They sound so..."

"So Beatles? Yes, I know! Listen to 'Scenes from My Funeral!' Tell me that guitar part isn't taken straight out of 'Getting Better!'"

"Well, they definitely sound like they like the Beatles, but I wouldn't quite compare..."

"Oh, they do. They really like the Beatles."

"I love how dense and layered the sound is-– the sound is just huge! It reminds me of..."

"The Beatles?!"

"Uh... Hey, what's he doing now?"

"Oh… you see, Kevin likes to tell stories. This song is called 'Ira's Brief Life as a Spider.' It's about a spider who gets bitten by a snake hiding in a lake in a crater on his own tongue."

"What in the fuck?! This is starting to freak me out. I love this music, but the lyrics are starting to get on my nerves a little."

"Granted, the lyrics are a bit twee. But the music is so good! Kevin can write a good melody so effortlessly and arrange it impeccably."

"Wait a second. Is this a Kinks song?"

"Yes! 'World Keeps Going Round.'"

"Good tune. But couldn't Kevin have done a bit more with the arrangement? Wouldn't it have been that much better if he'd given Ray Davies a complete psychedelic makeover?"

"Perhaps. Hold on, they’re finishing the set!"

And as the last few notes rung out from Kevin Barnes' guitar, the array of strange creatures that, along with me, had made up the audience, returned to their underground dwellings. This left only Robert and I.

"Say, Bob, that was a really fantastic show! I'm going to pick up one of their records as soon as I get back. Wait a second... get back?! How am I supposed to get out of here?!"

"Do not fear. One sip of this drink will return you to the place that you call home."

I grasped the silver-lined goblet from Robert's hand and took a quick sip of the iridescent liquid contained within. The second the drink touched my lips, I found myself standing back underneath the willow tree. The Elephant 6 Kingdom seemed nothing but a distant memory. Shaken, I gathered my bearings and started to head home. "Boy," I said to myself, "that was one hell of a trip. Kind of like..."

A familiar voice echoed in the distance: "Magical Mystery Tour??"

-Matt LeMay