"Three neighborhood kids took me to a rock concert/ The kind of music: old-school funk/ The women at the show were beautiful/ As they danced sexily on the grass/ One of them even petted my fur/ Fuck me in the goat-ass!/ Then some long haired guys grabbed me by the horns and threw me in the mosh pit/ They passed me around and treated me nice/ Till I nervously sprayed them with shit." -The Goat Song

Aryt, let's face it. What's My Name is typical Sandler as we love him, but none of these tracks compare to his last two records. Strangely, it's not impossible to like musically, with a splash of everything from country to reggae, not to mention a couple of Springsteen knock-offs. What's My Name is wall-to-wall loser ballads that get progressively more obscene as you get further in (which means you can skip the first seven tracks and go right to "Pantsin' And Dancin'," a hilarious tribute to '80s Studio 54 gender-bending: "Mr. Belvedere/ With his finger in his own rear/ Bernard King/ Showin' off his ding-a-ling/ Swimming Mark Spitz/ Playin' with his hairy tits/ Do the hustle with seven-footer Billy Russell/ (do the fuckin' hustle, jerkin' your love muscle)/ Shake your big, round ass with the ghost of Mama Cass.../ Come to the funkiest place in town/ The stars will show you how to move/ And dance/ Like you just shit your pants." Need I say more?

-James P. Wisdom