In a middle floor of a concrete and ceiling- tile tower, executives in suits sit around a conference table and discuss marketing. They're music executives, dressed in Bebe and Dolce. In a poorly- circulated environment of escalating one- upmanship, they're debating which genre is hot for 2000.

"What else can we fuse with rap or metal?"

"Or rap-metal?"

"Rap-metal is already a fusion."

"How about shoegazing?"

"But you could fuse something else, in addition to rap and metal, to rap-metal."

"Shoegazing? I don't see how that would fuse that well with rap or metal."

"Rap-shoegaze? Shoegaze-rap?"

"I don't see that working."

"No, no. I mean just shoegazing."

"A fusion of shoe and gazing? I wasn't aware those were separate genres."

"This isn't a fusion. I'm talking about bringing back shoegazing."

"Hmm, isn't it a bit dead?"

"Yes, exactly. It's perfect. Nostalgia sells. Retro sells."

"Hmm, but it wasn't very popular to begin with."

"Well, that's true, but rap started small and it wasn't until the NBA and Sprite that it really blew up."

"So what we need is some products!"

"Indeed. I'm ahead of you there, Barb. I had the hippies in art throw together some of my ideas."

"Let's see it, Gar."

"First we need a mascot. Let me show you Pally the Pedal and Whammy the 'Wham-Me' Bar. Pally is a talking effects pedal. When he hits himself on the head, he can change colors and personas. I'm thinking a Whatizit meets Pikachu. And this here is Whammy, the lovable 'Wham-Me' Bar. He comes from the magical land of..."

"Gary, I'm going to have to step in here. The bar is already called a 'whammy' bar. W-H-A-M-M-Y. You can't have 'Whammy the Whammy Bar.'"

"Hmm, that's a real stinger."

"Well, we'll go with Pally then."

"What we need now is a breakout artist."

"Someone we can really inject into the hearts of America, and subsequently the UK, Continental Europe, Japan, and Sub-Sahara Africa."

"So, who's the monkey?"

"Well, I hired a freelance consultant. He writes for a formidable online presence. He knows shoegazing. This kid eats 4AD cereal for a midnight snack. He worked for a modest fee. In fact, he only asked that I promise not to sign any twee bands for his help and patience."

"What did he say?"

"He recommended we go with Melochrome."

"Ooh! That sounds dreamy. I'm looking at my shoes already!"

"And they're lovely today, Linda."

"Those Steve Madden?"

"The name Melochrome alone certainly triggers all of the requisite shoegazing imagery. Color and reflection, with a taste of the languorous."

"Yes, it's rather 'far' 'out.'"

"And to top it off, their debut album was produced by Keith Cleversley, who's sculpted feedback for Mercury Rev, Hum, the Flaming Lips, and Spiritualized."

"I can't say I've heard of them."

"Suffice to say, they're the bee's knees of spaced-out rock."

"And the Melochrome album, The Music We Make, sounds great. Cleversley must operate out of a levitating eyrie, high in the translucent parts of the atmosphere. There's beautiful control to the resonance. Feedback and swirls are kept in open areas, but under invisible reins. But the moor to the electric melange is an endemic use of low- rent, close- your- eyes- and- press- your- eyeballs Rhodes piano, mellotron, and wurlitzer. The first generation of shoegazers worshipped the six-strings. Melochrome could usher in an era of analog keyboard- driven psychedelia. The songs with keys shine. Shoegazer's winning post move has always been the hypnotic repetition of just- out- of- reach hooks and laconic lyrics. Check, check."

"Very impressive work."

"Naturally, there are a few glitches to work out. The stripped- down, jangly verses on "A Day After Christmas" seem out of place. Bare, supine songs like "Radio Star" don't really develop enough. And for a shoegazer album, the vocals are mixed too high. Part of the appeal of shoegazer are the dreamy, subcutaneous lyrics. They should cloud like cream in tea, not congeal like skin on soup. But overall, there are enough rainy layers and shimmering ripples to refuel this genre. And "Kissing Spree" shows that higher tempos will yield great fruit in Melochrome's future. There's a Yo La Tengo tang. And it really harkens back to the glory days of Ride. It's quite Twisterella-ish."

"Twister relish?"

"Now that's an idea! Tropicana Twisters Relish. We can have sweet fruit relishes for sandwiches and desserts. We'll get Melochrome to do the commercial. Bing bam poom. Gold record."

"Well done, people. Let's get some Spago."

-Brent DiCrescenzo