I have so many different angles from which to approach this album. Seriously. It's a joke how many aspects of this album I can mock. From my first spin of Got It Made, I've been wracking my brain, only because I found it difficult to narrow down exactly which elements to publicly ridicule. Finally, after hours of deliberation, I think I've finally distilled every humorous and hackneyed item regarding Brassy into a few key points.

Let's talk about the band's personnel first. This British beat-heavy rock group are fronted by Jon Spencer's sister, Muffin. Yes, that's right. Muffin Spencer has a band. She plays guitar and vocalizes, with guitarist Stefan Gordon, bassist Karen Frost, and percussionist Jonny Barrington filling out the rest of the band. Barrington also happens to have one of the more amusing DJ aliases in recent memory: DJ Swett! Oh man. The laughs keep on a-rollin'.

Okay, now that we've gotten past the hilarious names, let's talk about the actual content of their supposedly "long-awaited" first LP. Brassy's sound is so incredibly derivative that many times at the beginning of a new song, I swear I've heard it before. But logic and history would eventually prove to me that I haven't. Chalk it up to their stunning unoriginality.

Unlike bands who can occasionally make the old sound new, Got It Made makes the old sound, well, older. The guitar licks don't even attempt creativity, instead content to rip from the pages of every vaguely bluesy rockstar's repertoire, even that of her own exploding brother. Mr. Swett utilizes retreaded turntable stylings resembling an eighth-generation Jazzy Jeff protege, opening the album with a hideous mock-DJ Shadow cut-and-paste intro. And while we're on the subject, check out "Who Stole the Show" for over a full minute of Swett's stellar stylings. Nothing happens! Honestly, it feels like five.

Sound like a recipe for asininity? We're not done yet! Muffin Spencer apes brother Jon at every possible interval, crossing that invisible line into absolute mimicry; her will to name-drop her own band mid-song, and shout about her sheer excellence is plain ridiculous. The first actual song on Got It Made, "No Competition," attempts to prove to us that no one's better than "the B-R-A-double-S-Y beat!" with constant insistence that they are, in fact, "number one," over a shamefully boring drum-n-bass backing. The contradiction is remarkable.

The only song that achieves any sort of rating on the enjoyment scale comes with "Good Times," but even that isn't worth more than a couple listens. If nothing else, it gets points for sounding unlike the rest of the album, even if its Go-Go's by-product feel assists the charm in wearing off quickly. So, don't listen to Muffin; Brassy just don't live up to her hype. I suppose I'll just have to wait for something else worthwhile from the Jon Spencer kin. I hear the upcoming effort from his second-cousin Cupcake should be pretty tight.

-Spencer Owen